Back in 2009, I suffered the worst break-up ever. Emily and I have been together for 2 years before she left me and when it happened, I was a complete wreck.
It all began about a couple of months before she broke up with me. She started being cold and quiet whenever we were together. I would text her, call her, and her response would just be two words or something. It was only until she sent me a message that didn't make any sense that I realized that the text wasn't intended for me. She was already trying to get on with someone before she broke up with me.
I confronted her about it and it lead to us breaking up. I wanted her to choose me against that prick she met at her job. In the end, she left me only to break up with the other guy after just a month of leaving me. She never came back. At first, I was angry. I started to miss her but it was too late.
I stopped my job, I stopped the after college class I was taking. My parents got scared of what was happening to me and decided to send me abroad to look for work. I managed to do it and landed a job.
I immediately met this girl in the new workplace. She was pretty, smart and seemed really into me. Back then though, I was still hung up with my ex and I just couldn't get her off my mind. I still decided to go out with this girl though just to make myself get on with my life. We watched a film, it was 'Twilight'. I remembered it because about a third into the film, this girl and I are already making out. Her lips were warm, very soft, the moans she were making could make any guy get up, carry her out of there and take her to the closest room. It was amazing until I started to get pictures of my ex in my head.
Our first kiss was on the day she broke up with her boyfriend. I have no intention at all to kiss her that day because we were just friends. She was crying and all I could remember was that I was thinking of anything funny just to brighten her mood a bit. I couldn't think. She was hugging me and it just happened. She pecked my lip and I just went for a longer one. We kissed for 2 minutes at least. I remember the feeling so well. Her lips were the softest lips ever. The smell of her breath. I remember my chest feeling like it was going to explode. After that, we stood up smiling at each other. We hugged as if we didn't want to let go of that moment. We went home holding hands. Not talking, just smiling at each other. We texted all night. After that, for the next three months, we would not stop seeing each other. Not kissing or anything, just hanging out. Laughing at each others stories. I still remember how she would tell a story and would run out of breath because she talks so fast. It was funny.
The girl I am with in the cinema took me back to her apartment. We made out and got to her room. I keep saying in my head forget about Emily. Forget her, it's been a year. It sort of worked for a bit and the next thing I know, this girl's top was gone. She was wearing a yellow bra, her skin was so smooth and fair. She has a mole on her left breast which I thought was sexy. She started kissing my lip, then down my neck. She kissed my chest and my belly button as she unzips my trousers. This could have been amazing for any guy but again, my heart got in the way. While she was kissing my body, I could just see Emily doing the same thing. I just had to stop the girl. I told her everything. It's not fair for her. I had to leave and we never really spoke again.
I had a couple of other dates after her but not of them worked. It was awful. I would get drunk. Walk around the unfamiliar city I was in, hoping to be in an accident so Emily would know and maybe she'll miraculously appear in the hospital when I wake - just like in the movies. It took 4 years for me to realize that I was finally over her. When that moment came, I was ready to mingle but I feel like I have lost everything I knew about dating. I remember when I first got a date after such a long time, I was walking down the street with a huge bouquet of flowers in my hand, nearly slipping as I walk back home because my date will start in 4hours time.
None worked. I soon got depressed and thought, okay, I don't need to be in a serious relationship. I just really need to get laid. I started going to discos only to find myself out of place. I felt like the oldest guy in there. I wanted to complain about how smoky it is in there and how sticky the floor was. God, I really was too old for that kind of stuff. Soon, I find myself chatting with a girl in facebook. She was about an hour and a half away from my original village where my folks live.
We decided to meet one day when I was on vacation. She was nice, funny and chatty. Her name was Cherise. We had a nice lunch and I thought, huh, she is nice. Maybe I'll meet her again one day, but all of a sudden, she starts asking me about sex. I suddenly felt, ok, this is not the plan but we'll see where it goes. We went home and started texting and when she found out I won't be staying long in our village and that I have to go back out of the country in a few days, she decided to meet again the next day.
Things just went out of control. Before I knew it, our clothes are off and I was on top of her. Her body was so smooth. Her boobs were small but it is the softest and silkiest I have ever felt. Her kiss though was different. It was more like she was sucking my lip. She told me she had sex before but it was a little strange how eager she was to do it. Only when I struggled to get in when I realised she hasn't really done this before. I realised I was experiencing a whole lot of new things then.
I have never slept with a stranger before. I only known her for a day after meeting her in person and I have never slept with someone who hasn't had sex before as well. We were in that room for three hours. It was amazing.
Soon, I had to go back abroad. Cherise and I texted for a while but being away didn't really work well for us. It was over as quick as it started. I guess the moral of the story here is that life is simply unpredictable. Sometimes it stomps on you so hard it feels like you won't be coming out of the mud. Sometimes, it feels like your in a boat with no paddles and it just takes you to places you wouldn't really consider going to. In my opinion, it's just up to us how we take it all. We can either be the victim for the rest of our life, or be the one to celebrate every breath we take in every minute of every day, because we never know. We never know when we'll kiss or hug someone for the last time. We never know the places we'll be going to. All there is, is to experience life.