Hanging by a Thread II

I had made a trip to Markham, a suburb of Toronto, to hear my friend, Judy sing at a new club. While there I had met a very promising man, who played in the band that was also performing there. He was funny and sweet and extremely easy to look at. Chatting with him made me realize how abusive my relationship with Jake, my ex, truly was. No visible bruises- but a constant hum of anxiety had been the theme of our relationship for the past seven months.

Judy came back from her singing set and settled in next to me and noticed I’d changed from Sidecars to ginger ale and gave me a quizzical look.

“Ah, yeah. I guess my emotions are a little raw to be over-drinking. I think I just scared that poor fellow away.” I said, lighting up another cigarette and enjoying not getting sick from it.

In the background behind us, I heard a familiar voice and a shot of electricity jolted through my body from head to toe.

“Oh, my God, I missed you, Baby. I thought I’d never get back from that damned job up North, eh.”

“Jakey, I’m horny. Let’s just go back to my place. I don’t need any more to drink.” A drunken, slutty, little voice piped up.

I looked in the mirror behind the bar between the bottles and saw a bleached blond with big boobs and not enough shirt hugging my ex-asshole, Jake, and crawling all over him. Well, well, well, this just kept getting more interesting. She wasn’t pregnant, so it wasn’t his wife. He was lying to her about his whereabouts last week, so it wasn’t me.

I jabbed Judy in the ribs, “What? What? Tina, that hurt.”

“Look, I hissed. No. Don’t look. Look in the mirror.”

“Holy shit- is that…” she began.

“Yep. It sure is and that’s not his wife.” I whispered, “sounds like he’s making excuses for the week he was with me in Quebec City.”

“What are you going to do?”

“Nothing yet. I’m thinking.” Then I ordered another Sidecar and a gin and tonic for Judy. This kind of thinking needed lubrication. Lots of it. I clinked glasses with Judy and put my evil thinking cap on. So far, he hadn’t noticed me, and I was hoping it would stay that way. At least for the time being.

Jake came up to the service area of the bar, which was almost on top of me, so I leaned over like I was telling Judy a secret. He didn’t recognize me, with my new hairstyle, fingernail polish, and clothes, but I caught him checking out my legs. Good grief. All hormones- no man.

He picked up the tab for a little drink with an umbrella and two Labatt Bleus. I could clearly see their table from where I was sitting and she was just about sitting on his lap, playing with the chest hair that stuck out of his partially unbuttoned shirt. Little whore.

I had a few ideas swimming around in the cognac of my mind. I could simply go over there and punch her lights out and drag her across the floor. I could go over there and say hello to Jake and ask him when he was going to get back from seeing his wife. Or I could ignore them completely and go outside and smash the hell out of his truck.

Judy had to go up for another set and she left me there swimming in my evil murk by myself, until Bill returned, and we took off where we left off kidding with each other.

I whispered into his ear, “Do you mind if I use your body for a little while? My ex just walked in with another woman, who also is not his wife. I don’t want to make you feel bad by using you. But…”

“Only if you don’t get carried away and go home with me later.” He agreed.

Fair is fair, so I wrapped my arms around Bill and kissed him on the lips, doing a deep tongue dive and shocking the shit out of him, I think.

It didn’t seem to deter him, because he gave as good as he got, holding me tighter and pulling me to him. We both broke out laughing at the silliness of it. He pulled me close again and said, “You aren’t going to stop, are you?”

“Um. I can’t do anything right now, but I wish I could.” I said, meaning it.

“That’s fine with me. This is more action than I’ve had all year.”

“It’s only the fourth week of the year.” I reminded him.

“Yeah, so far it’s been a pretty dry year.”

We continued shameless petting until Jake came back up to the bar for a refill. He was checking out my ass, which was being firmly gripped by my new playmate when something must have registered in his drunken, neanderthal brain.

He stood stock still for a moment, then swigged his beer in a few gulps, ordered another one, and tapped me on the shoulder, “Tina? What the hell are you doing? Is that you?”

I turned around so he could compare my legs and ass with my face. Sure enough. It was me.

“Yes?” I said sweetly. “Do you have a problem, sir?”

“You gotta be shittin me. Seriously? Really? We’re barely broken up for a fucking week and you’re already screwing someone new?”

Then he looked over at Bill and spewed, “Get your fucking hands off her.”

“Don’t tell my boyfriend what to do, you lying, cheating piece of shit,” I said way too loudly. “You’ve been fucking three of us for how long now and you wonder how your life got so messed up. You need help. There is something wrong with you.”

I gripped Bill’s thigh even more tightly, to Jake’s extreme displeasure. By that time his Markham floozie had to join in the party. “Jakey, who is this? How do you know her?” She whined in a nasal voice.

“Yeah, Jakey,” I mimicked her whiny voice, “tell her how you know me.”

“Sandy, go sit the fuck back down. This isn’t your problem.” Jake ordered.

“Yeah, Sandy, go sit back down. You don’t want to disobey Jakey and make him go home to his wifey. You know he got wifey and me both pregnant, don’t you? Even after his terrible accident. You know, when he fell off a ladder and got his balls crushed?”

Jake slammed his hand down on the bar. “Son of a bitch. You’re crazy, Tina. You’re fucking insane. I never should have gotten involved with you.”

“That’s funny, Jakey, because when I met you, I was perfectly sane. Must be what you do to women.” And I flounced off with Bill right behind me.

“Holy shit, Tina. That dude is an asshole. Let me walk you to the subway stop. I’m gonna give Judy my number. Call me when you get back home. I’ll be done here soon.”

This time I gave Bill a real kiss. He was a good guy.

As soon as he showed me which platform to catch the train, I waited for him to leave. Then I tip-toed back up to street level and spied Jake’s truck in the parking lot behind the club. Glancing around over my shoulder and seeing no one, I walked over and looked in the bed of the truck. Oh, my. A tire iron. The man is always prepared for emergencies. That’s good. However, this is one emergency he was not prepared for.

I scooted over to the side facing away from the back door of the club and unloosened the nuts on both tires until they were just hanging by, literally, a thread. Then I bashed the passenger seat window out and let myself in. Taking my time, I pulled a nail file out of my purse and went to town on the genuine leather seats.

‘Sandy was here’

‘I hate you’

Then I hopped out, replaced the tire iron in the bed of his not-so-new truck, and skipped off giggling all the way to the subway station.