What Changed Her Life?

Everyone in Kaliganj was getting ready for their morning chores as the sun's rays filtered through the tall trees that bordered the city. Even though it was just another day for everyone else, Kusum lay awake, staring at the tiled roof that was sure to give way to the rains that were due this year. She was not at all concerned about the roof. She had to worry about her future, which was very important to her. She had celebrated her 15th birthday exactly 262 days ago. Yesterday, she had stared at her reflection in the only mirror in the house because she was curious about her body.

Even though she lived in a conservative village where women were not allowed to show off their skin, she was always awed by the large posters that hung near the well just outside of her community. She noticed that the heroines wore cleavage-exposing clothing. Like them, she has always aspired to dress in high heels as well as wear clothes that resembled theirs. This woman prayed to God day and night for an opportunity to live this life. The young woman had no idea that one terrible day would take away her right to dream.

Kusum, dressed in a white salwar kameez, was abducted 2 days after her birthday by 2 strange-looking expressionless men. Because they had much more intense eyes than anything she had ever seen before, she thought they looked strange. In a vehicle she mistakenly thought was a jeep, they blindfolded her and forced her in. She had always wanted to ride in a car, but this trip was unpleasant. Already oblivious to what was going on around her, she had a slim chance of escaping. Kusum felt uncomfortable in her seat, sandwiched between two large men who kept falling on her on what appeared to be a curve in the road. Her legs were spread out and she could feel what appeared to be a thick rod in between them. However, she had never heard of it before. All she knew about it was that every car had one. Every time he pushed it down towards his legs, he touched her there. But he was too big for her to move him away from her.

Eventually, they came to a halt and pulled her from the vehicle. At that exact moment, she was slapped across the face and her hands moved to remove the blindfold so she could see where they were. The woman was shocked, so she took a deep breath and decided not to act. She was thinking about her baba and amma at the time. They wouldn’t find out about her absence until late that evening. Cooking today had been a promise she’d made to Lakshmi Tai. When Lakshmi Tai became pregnant, she was alone. Kusum shed a tear as she thought about her. She asked God for forgiveness in an innocent manner. She was enveloped in an awkward silence that seemed to suffocate her. She hadn’t heard a word since they had picked her up. She could hear some grunts coming from one of the men, probably the one sitting to her left. A man grabbed Kusum’s hand and pulled her towards him as she tried to understand what was happening. She lost her balance and fell to the floor, her fingers twitching in his burly hand as she fell to the ground.

She was still kneeling on the floor when she felt two hands reach for her breasts. Uncertainty reigned over whether he was touching her breasts out of pleasure or as a means of forcing her to get up. Then, just as she was about to get up, she felt another pair of hands push her down. It was the first time she screamed. Despite their efforts, she was unable to break free due to the weight of the hands-on her. Every part of her body was pinched by the men. She broke down and cried. She wanted nothing more than to get out of there. However, this was a near-impossible task to accomplish. Then, one of the men tore her clothes off, leaving her with almost nothing on. When sexual organs are not fully developed, this is a nightmare for a girl. The man pushed his way into her body and began to crawl inside. Her heart pounded so hard that she thought she was going to pass out from the exertion. In the end, she had no other choice, and she had to give in.

Her mind was still flooded with images. Once again, she could feel her heart thumping in her chest. Yesterday, she had felt it. Her daily life was impacted by this fact. But no matter how hard she tried, the memories would not fade. Her wounds were healing as she counted down the days. Despite their support, she knew that her baba and amma were ashamed in front of the other villagers. Nobody would want to marry her, and she was sure she would be shunned in no time. Even though she couldn’t change what had happened, she still needed to do something to help her heal. In her dreams, she imagined herself as the heroine, wanting to look like them, wear their clothes, and walk in their high heels. This time, however, she had a slightly different dream than usual. Neither she nor her family had the financial means to purchase elegant clothing or to learn English fluently. The amount of money she would earn, however, would not be sufficient for her to support herself on her own. She was willing to give her body away. A life she didn’t want to live but was compelled to live would be forced upon her. She would be willing to sell herself for money if she could get it.

News reports of minor girls being sexually assaulted and then abandoned on the streets are commonplace these days. As minors, these girls may not be aware of what is being done to them at times. Such a criminal act leaves a permanent mark on the victim’s mind. They have no idea what is happening to them. Victims of rape are forced to become prostitutes out of fear of society, which is true. Rape victims deserve respect. How do you think their tears will dry and their wounds heal if we, as a society, refuse to accept them?

It is time to stop placing blame on the rape victims.