Too Far Down

        Leaves blow past me as I watch my boyfriend of eight months walk away. He just broke up with me for being in love with someone else, my friend Park in particular. I tried to talk him out of it, to convince him that he's just being paranoid, but he saw right through me. I feel a twinge of sadness while the outline of his body fades further away. I breathe in deeply and turn. I start walking along the path again and pull my phone out of my pocket. I dial Park's number.

        "Hello?"

        "Hey, what are you doing?" I ask, happy to hear his voice.

        "I was just practicing lines with Elvin. We're going to act in The Winter's Tale by William Shakespeare as Perdita and Florizel. It's so great. What's up with you?"

        I scoff at his mention of Alvin - I mean, Elvin - his girlfriend. "Oh, nothing." I say as sweet and innocently as I can. "Caleb just broke up with me."

        "Oh, shit, really? Why?"

        "I don't fucking know. He wouldn't tell me. I guess he couldn't get his thoughts together or something. I don't fucking know."

        "Damn. Are you okay? Is there anything I can do?"

        "I don't..." I let my voice fade off as I think of something to say. It's a stupidly difficult task as all I want to do is scream 'yeah, come fuck me', but he'd probably get mad. "Yeah, actually. Can we go out tonight to Checkers and Rally's? I could really use some loaded fries and a caramel cheesecake stacker."

        "Oh, yes! Elvin and I have been totally craving their fry burgers! We'll be there in about two hours, okay?"

        "Elvin's coming too?"

        "Of course. She is my girlfriend." He says this like it's the most sane thing in the world, and I just want to strangle him. "I'll call you when we're close so you can head up there, okay?"

        "Okay."

        "Sweet, see you there!"

        I scoff at the sound of the tone. I want to call him back and tell him that I never want to see him again unless he drops that bitch, but then he'll never want to be with me. I might not have much of a shot now, but that doesn't mean I'm completely out of chances. Not yet, anyway. So I resort to sitting on some rocks and basking in the warmth of my anger.

        Besides her obviously boyish name, there is a lot about Elvin to hate. One of my favourites is that she came in and made Park love her right before I told him how I felt. One of my old friends loved to point out how they didn't start dating until after we graduated, five years ago, which was three years after he fell in love with her. This same friend also loved to point out how I knew and cared for him four years before then and it's my own fault for waiting so damn long. But what does she know? She also thought it was cute how they put off their feelings for each other for three years so the school stress wouldn't get in their way. Really, it was just strange and stupid.

        Stupid just like Elvin's jokes, or whole personality. I mean, seriously, who goes on week long road trips for no reason and with only enough money for gas? That's so dumb and lame. Dumb just like her jokes and lame just like her music, I swear. Honestly, I think the only reason Park likes her is because she writes songs and books about him.  She seriously has a whole comic series about him being this adventurous, mystery-solving photographer. It's ridiculous. The name, too. "The Adventures of Camera Man"? Really? I could come up with a better name and plot. Park just loves it, though. He says that it's the sweetest thing ever. In my opinion, it's creepy and weird. She needs to get a life. Like, really bad. She's already on the fast track of losing her mind. Nobody writes a whole comic about their boyfriend. If they do, they sure don't turn it into a series.

        'Good God, Karen! Would you just stop already? Elvin is not that bad and Park is really happy with her. Can't you put aside your jealously for one night so we can all have a good time with our friend before they hit the road?'

        That was the last time all of us got together. It was Elvin and Park, me, and our friends Paul, Eve, and Barney. We were out at some new restaurant to spend one last night with Park before he and his squeeze left for Gelena. I had spent the whole evening making comments about everything Elvin said and poking jokes at her. By the time our food had arrived, she was refusing to look up or talk. Just five minutes after that, she was up and gone outside. Park went running after her and the other three started scolding at me. Eve even accused me of being jealous. I could hardly believe it. Me? Jealous of Elvin? Please. But of course, none of them saw it my way. Then the guys went on to say that I need to get over myself because I'm ruining the night for everybody. They called me a baby! A baby! In the span of a minute, I was accused of being jealous of that loser Elvin Mortimer, then I got called a baby and a party pooper. Like, excuse me for caring about my friend.

        And who the hell names their child Alvin Mortimer? Oh, I mean, Elvin.

        "I just wish that she would die. Then Park and I could be together." I mutter to myself.

        So what if I am a little jealous of Elvin? It's only because she's with Park. I should be the only one with Park. I might not like theatre or all the music he listens to or road-trips, but I've known him longer. I'm worth more than her, literally. I am a million times more beautiful than she is, I have a lot more money than she ever will, and... I'm just better, okay? So what if I never told Park how I feel? That doesn't mean some bitch like her can move in on him.

        I force myself to stand up from my rock and start walking back the way I came. Maybe I'm a little too hard on Elvin. She might not be as perfect as me and she makes some mistakes, but she does try. And Park has been a little happier since they started dating. That doesn't mean I have to like her, though. But does it mean I have the right to hate her? Just because I want to be with Park? That does seem crazy.

        No! I will not doubt myself or my judgement. Elvin needs to go and Park needs to be with me. Tonight, after dinner, I'm going to tell them that. Hopefully it'll make Park open his eyes and discover that he needs to be with me.

        I groan louder than anybody ever has before as I lift myself up to the sky. I run my hands through my hair while I walk along, trying to evacuate the hate of Elvin out of my body. My groan quickly turns into a scream though as I slip down a hole. I go sliding down a tunnel of dirt, screaming the whole way through. The tunnel comes to a sudden stop and I hit the ground hard. I frantically look around, taking in my surroundings, and find myself more confused than ever.

        I'm in a cell of sorts. The ground is made of hard cement and the bars are rusted. It's so dark that I have trouble seeing. It smells of mold and dirt, and strongly of something else I can't identify. The mixture of it all is making it hard for me to breathe. All I feel like doing is sneezing and coughing. I can feel a nose bleed coming on, too. My eyes are in pain from the poor exposure. Everything's in pain, really. I really hit the ground harder than I originally thought. It's hard to move. It's hard to want to move. So I decide not to move. I do the next best, less painful thing: I scream for help.

        A chorus of "shut up"s and words to quiet me ring through the air. I stop screaming immediately, taken too far aback. I wait, but nothing more is said after the shushing ends. After thinking about it for a minute, I do it again. The choir of silence interrupts me again. This time, when I stop, I'm met with more than nothing.

        "Please, Miss, don't scream." A small, British voice calls to me.

        "Don't even cry." An older, gruff one says after.

        "What? Why not?" I ask.

        "Stop talking. You are all going to get us whipped." A frantic-sounding woman adds in.

        "Oh, hush now, Sally. The new girl is obviously scared. How is she supposed to be calm if no one tells her why it's important?" Another voice, this one of an older woman's, says. "Hello, new girl. I'm Fran. Please do try to avoid raising your voice and make sure not to talk too much, please. You are going to get us all caught and killed if you do."

        "Uh, killed? Killed by who? By what? What's going on here?" I ask, fightened.

        "The rabbit holes are a trap." The British boy tells me.

        "The rabbit people use them to capture those with evil in their hearts." The older gentleman explains.

        "Rabbit people?" I ask quietly to myself. "But wait, none of you sound like you have evil inside of you."

        "On the contrary," Fran corrects me. "I murdered my husband out of nothing but cold blood."

        "And I," says the woman called Sally. "used to help sell people on the black market."

        The old man speaks now. "I have a nasty habit of conning people out of their life savings."

        "What about the little boy?" I ask hestitantly.

        "I like t0 pull the heads off of animals."

        Surprised, I say nothing in response. He said it so innocently, I'm not even sure whether to believe it. But nobody corrects him or tells him to tell the truth. They simply fall silent with me. How can somebody who sounds so young be so violent? It's shocking.

        "So tell us, dear, what sort of evil rests inside your heart?" Fran asks.

        "I don't know," I answer.

        "Oh, surely you do."

        "I think the only thing I'm guilty of is loving my best friend who has a girlfriend," I say with a shrug.

        "Anything else?" Sally cuts in.

        "No."

        "You've never had a single thought about this other girl wishing her harm?" Fran jumps back in.

        "I guess a few, yeah."

        "Ooh, like what?" Sally wonders excitedly.

        "I've prayed a few times that she would get murdered or would die in some natural disaster. I've also hoped that she would kill herself. I've actually told her to a few times on those anonymous messaging apps. I'm always hoping for her to fall ill and to stop existing. I just want her to disappear from his life, no matter how much pain it may cause him."

        "That would definitely be evil. Nobody can hold that much hate inside their heart and it not turn into poison." Everyone agrees with Fran's statement.

        "Going back a bit, can you tell me some more about these rabbit people?"

        "They're giant rabbits." The boy says, leaving a lot untold.

        The old man coughs out a chuckle. "He's not wrong. They are giant rabbits. They look and hop exactly like normal rabbits, only they're about six feet tall, can talk, and can walk just fine like humans. I'm pretty sure they're guards, but none of us know who they're working for. If you haven't noticed, none of us can get out."

        "I see."

        "Good, now stop talking before they hear us."

        Not too thrilled about the arrangement, I stop talking. I wish I knew more, but even if we could talk, I don't think the group knows a whole lot else. With a sign, I sit on the hard floor and lean against the probably bug-infested walls with closed eyes.

        I wake to the sound of a gate slamming. I lift my head to see two, over-sized rabbits staring at me. Their grey ears are straight up and their red eyes are practically staring right through me. They're wearing these long, red jackets with strange badges on them. At a better look, it's obvious they're black and blue badges with the face of a bunny on them and two swords. The two bunny guards grab me by my arms and drag me out of my cell down the hall. As we move, I peek into the other cells, trying to find the group I spoke with before, but every single one is now empty. I get pulled down the end of the hall to this big entrance door. They open the door and I'm dragged through.

        I'm met with the face of a giant throne room. There's one of those fancy chairs in the middle, giving the place a courtroom feel about it. The catbird seat is empty, however the rest of the room is full of more human-sized rabbits. More guards are lined up against the walls. Bystanders stand everywhere and anywhere, excited for the show. There are some watching us from the balcony dressed up in hooded red robes. I try to count them, but I have to move before I can properly. I'm taken further into the room and placed directly in front of the throne chair. I feel the fear building up inside me as trumpets are blown. A set of doors to the left of me opens and in walks another rabbit dressed in a black robe with some sort of staff. Unlike human courts, nobody has to stand as they already are and everybody claps as the leader is walking to their rightful place.

        The clapping stops as their leader stops and looks at me. "Karen Gacy," She says in a booming voice. "You are here for the crime of carrying jealousy and hatred within your heart, for interfering in a relationship that is not your own, for judging someone you do not truly know, for only thinking of yourself, for breaking a man's heart over nothing, for wishing death on another person who has done nothing worthy of such a crime, and for being so crude to our dear Goddess. Do you have anything to say?"

        "Um, yeah. Who the hell are you?" I ask, starting to think this is some crazy dream.

        Hushed and urgent chatter breaks out through the room. "You shall not use that tone and those words in this room. Do you have anything, regarding to this, to say?"

        "I don't think I did anything wrong."

        "You disrespected our Goddess and our future God, a crime worthy of death itself, you disrespected yourself, and you disrespected an innocent man."

        "Who is your Goddess? What are you talking about?"

        "The one you call Elvin Mortimer. We have chosen her to be our Goddess once she is wed. You have committed many crimes within your past ten years of life and for them, you shall be punished. Do you have anything in your defense to say?"

        I stop and think about it. If whatever I said or wished upon Elvin is really punishable by death, then no matter what I say, they are probably going to kill me. I might as well say what I want to say. "Yes. Elvin is a horrid, attention-seeking, home-wrecking, man-stealing bitch. I wish that I had bigger balls so that I could have run her over or done something before all of this happened. I wish that I had killed her."

        The room gasps. The judge shushes them quickly and turns her situation back to me. "Now that you have incriminated yourself farther, do you wish to attempt defending yourself?"

        "Not really, and I ain't taking anything back."

        She sighs. "I don't know if I want to be disappointed in your pride or happy with how easy you're making this. Do you want to pick your punishment?"

        "Yes, please. Send me back to the surface world."

        "No. You can either be set on fire, hung, or, because we listen, run over."

        "Alright. Burn me. Burn me the way that your precious, pathetic, piece-of-shit, soon-to-be Goddess should be burned. I don't give a single fuck." I raise both my middle fingers as I say this, hoping the shock value is enough to give them all heart attacks.

        The rabbits in the room start screeching at me. The judge demands that I am captured again and taken in another room to the left. The whole time I'm being dragged across the floor, I'm yelling as many bad things about Elvin as I can think of. It starts getting graphic as I start making explicit threats against her. The guards have to hold back the crowd as they start to rush towards me in anger. Soon enough, I'm thrown through some doors and find myself standing directly in front of a stake. The rabbits in the red robes from before are lined up behind the stake, just waiting. The guards leave me with them and go back to the throne room.

        "Karen Gacy, prepare to be punished." The one in the very center says.

        With great speed, they rush at me. I'm picked up and carried to the stake. Faster than imagined, I'm tied up tight against the picket. The remaining twelve form a circle around me and their cult leader. They chant an ominous saying in a language I can't quite understand as he slowly walks towards me with a lit match. I make sure to glare at him while he moves, never keeping my eyes off him. I regret the decision when I see him lit me up and realise that this is very much real, and I will never be able to have Park now.