The Boy with the Crooked Smile

My heart is pounding out of my chest as I push as much energy into my legs as I can. The sun peppers the ground with beams of light, but I don’t stop to marvel in the beauty because my body pushes me to run.

My eyes dart around the aged farm, searching for somewhere to hide. Before my brain has even processed what I see, my feet move in the direction of the old barn. Imposing against the trees, the bright red painted wood structure calls to me, heralding just what I need.

I duck through the chained door easily, dust sprinkling down onto my head, dislodged by the movement. I squint into the darkness, my eyes adjusting slowly to the muted light.

Once used to house the horses, it now lies dormant and quiet. Remnants of straw lie on the ground; they seem to whisper under the heel of my shoes as I tiptoe along the wood. My leg hits something hard with a dull clang, and I freeze.

How loud was that? Will he find me?

After what feels like an eternity, I shuffle past the old feeding trough, feeling with my hands to make sure I don’t bang into it again. My fingers find the rung of a ladder. The wood marred from age is coarse under my fingers. I grip the sides firmly and edge up each step, planting my feet carefully as I climb in the darkness.

The dormer window, lazily covered by black tape and paper, allows a beam of light in, courtesy of a small rip. When I finally reach the top of the ladder, I breathe a small sigh of relief. I crawl along the eave floor and lean against the solitary bale of hay, letting my head fall back into the spiky straws.

I almost scream when a hand grips my leg. My eyes dart open and I see the crooked grin of my friend, Jamie. “Scared you.” He snickers.

I feign annoyance, but really, I’m willing my heart back to its normal rhythm. “You didn’t scare me. I was just pausing before I kicked your ass!”

He moves over and nudges me, “In your dreams Willow.”

He is always here. No matter the time, he’s always skulking around the farm, watching, drawing. It would annoy me if I wasn’t so enamoured with him. He spreads his legs out in front of himself, crossing them to hide the hole in the knee that hasn’t been patched. His boots scuffed and tarnished, one tied together with string rather than a lace.

I balk at him leaning against my stack. “What are you doing here? Your mama will have your hide if you go back late again Jay.”

He shrugs, pulling out his notepad. It’s curled up in a roll like a newspaper, everything inside damaged from it constantly being in his pocket. Not that I’d ever seen what was in there. No one had I bet. “I’m not scared. Of anyone.”

“Oh really? I don’t believe you! Everyone gets scared.”

He scribbles on the page; the scratch seems to echo around the room. “Not me.”

We both freeze when we hear the scuffle of boots on the dirt path outside. The soft tinkle of small stones being kicked up. He presses his finger to his lips, his eyes intense on mine. I nod slowly, my own eyes wide.

“WILLOW!”

I flinch at the sound, and pull my legs up, wrapping my arms around myself. He can’t find me. Not yet. My skin prickles with adrenaline, my mouth splits into a nervous smile, an anxious laugh tries to bubble up from my throat and I gulp it down making a strange hiccupping sound.

“Close one.” I whisper when the person retreats.

He nods sagely, his head dropping back down to his pad. I wait a few minutes and then the silence becomes deafening. “What you drawing in there?”

He doesn’t look up. “I don’t know yet.”

“You are so weird.”

He narrows his eyes at me. “I’m not weird. You’re weird!”

I scoff. “I don’t lurk around people’s houses and spend my life scratching in a book! My daddy says trying to be an artist is like trying to skate on a frozen lake. Dangerous and foolish, and a sure-fire way to a quick drop.”

“Your daddy is an idiot!”

I gasp. “Hush! You watch your tongue, Jamie Jones!”

He snickers, “I’m going to be famous. One day, you will see.”

“You are? Well hot damn! I better be making a move on you then sugar.” I roll my eyes.

He scratches again, and I try to peak over his hand, but he closes the book. “Why don’t you want to be my girlfriend? I’ve asked you ten times now Willow.”

I smile, “I’m not allowed a boyfriend. You know that. I’m a good girl.”

“Oh yeah. You weren’t so good when you shoved me in the lake. Or when you knocked that hive with a stick, and I had to run for my life.” He admonishes. “You are mean too you know!”

I frown. “Well then, why do you want me to be your girl then?”

“Because you are the prettiest girl in the world.”

I feel my cheek’s heat and I can’t hide my smile. He isn’t embarrassed at all. He just grins that crooked smile at me. “Well, you are when you smile. When you are angry with me, you don’t look as good.”

I shove him hard. “You are a jerk! If you weren’t such a jerk, maybe I’d smile a little more.”

He turns, lying his book down. It lifts off the floor at the edges, all crinkled and sad looking. He lies on his front and rests his head on his hands. “What do you wanna be?”

I lean back. “I dunno. A mama?”

He scowls. “You wanna be more than a mama Willow.”

“What’s wrong with a mama? They are sweet, and kind and they take care of the kids, they have a purpose. What do you wanna be?”

“I already told you. I’m gonna be famous.”

“As what?”

He smiles. “I dunno yet. Maybe I’ll paint, or write, or draw. I’ll make something that someone wants, and they will give me a lot of money for it. Then I’ll come back here, and I’ll show your daddy who I am.”

I do laugh at that. I cover my mouth with my hand and stifle the sound that comes out of me. “Oh sure.”

It isn’t a secret. My daddy is a tough man. He works at the abattoir now he’s quit the cattle farming, and all the kids fear him. I don’t. He’s my daddy and he isn’t violent, he’s just tall and fearsome looking. He puffs up his chest, “I will. You watch me. I’ll walk right up to his door and bang on it. I’ll tell him what I have and then I’ll ask if I can marry you.”

“What if I say no?”

His eyes flick to mine and he holds my gaze. I feel the butterflies fill my stomach and I squirm a little under his watch. His gaze moves to my lips and back up again. “You gonna say no to me Willow? If I come here with a fancy truck, and nice clothes.”

I giggle. I can’t help it. I both love and hate him. He’s unkempt, and strange, but he has an allure. Something different about him that most see as strange, but…not me.

“Maybe I will.”

“Your daddy will call up the stairs, and you will float down in a nice dress. Your pretty blonde hair tied up, you remember, like at your cousins wedding, those little flowers in it? You’ll look at me like a stranger. A very handsome stranger…”

I nod, utterly enthralled. “Then what?”

He grins, “I’ll ask you one simple question.”

“What question Jamie?” I whisper.

He turns and lies back. “You will have to wait and see.”

The chain on the barn clangs loudly and the door swings open. I squeak and his eyes jerk to the eaves. I shuffle away but I’m too late. He’s seen me. Jamie grips my hand and pulls me to the back, finding a second ladder. He urges me down and I scramble as quickly as I can. He follows and we set off at a run. Fleeing the barn, our shoes kicking up dirt and stones, he doesn’t let go of my hand even when I slow, even when I have to stop to catch my breath. My plaited hair is now half out, blowing in the breeze.

We duck into the forest just near the house, perfect viewing spot of the old barn. Not a moment later my brother storms out, screaming my name. I giggle, my heart racing, my limbs humming with excitement and adrenaline.

Jamie eyes him carefully, “Coast is clear Willow.”

I smile, my hands pressing on the rough bark of the tree, the canopy of leaves shading us. Protecting us from the blistering sun. “He’s gonna be mad.”

“I’ll protect you.”

I smile, “You will?”

His hazel eyes look into mine. “That’s what a husband does.”

“You aren’t my husband yet Jamie Jones.”

He laughs, “Yet...that’s progress!”

I shove him and run away. He gives chase and I dart around the house and through the trees. He doesn’t relent, and I find myself tiring. I turn to see where he is, and I feel the earth slip from under my feet. My body goes limp as I fall, a ball of leaves and dirt, rolling down the bank. I come to a stop at the creek, my head swirling with dizziness. I hear his voice but it’s a blur.

“Willow. Get my hand. Quick!”

I look around, my eyes unfocussed, I see the dirt covering my yellow dress and tears prick at my eyes. “I’m all dirty!”

“You are going to be all dead if you don’t get back up here. They’re coming Willow!”

My eyes dart around, and I see the water rippling slowly. I know what that ripple is. I haul myself up, ignoring the dull ache of my body and reach for his hand. He leans over as far as he can, our fingers barely touching. “Help Jamie!”

Cold sweat covers my body, the dirt and grime a distant memory to the fear that now devours me. He grunts and groans, reaching out. I scream when I finally feel the grip of his fingers around my wrist. He drags me up, just as the gator appears at the edge of the water, his watching eyes deciphering if I am worth the strike.

I’m on the bank now and out of reach so he decides against it and slips back under the inky surface.

I collapse, sobs wracking my body. It doesn’t even register that I’m crying right now. He wraps his arm around me, “Don’t worry. I got you Willow.”

I sag into him, all my energy deserting me, leaving me about as useful as a limp noodle. “I almost…. almost…”

He shushes me softly. “Its ok. I’d have jumped right in for you.”

Fat tears slip down my face and I wipe them with the back of my hand, noticing I’m just spreading grime around my face. “Don’t be so foolish.”

He grins, “My Grammy says we are all fools in love Willow.”

“I’m pretty sure Elvis said that.”

“Him too.”

I look at him, his hands and clothes covered in my dirt, his eyes shining happily. I lean forward and press my lips to his. He stills, surprised, and then he kisses me back gently. My first kiss ever! With Jamie! I jerk away and he smiles shyly. “Wow.”

I stand up and try to compose myself and head towards my house, the feel of his lips on mine. I smile to myself and turn.

“Jamie, I’ll say yes. I promise.”