Shiver Me Timbers

Out to dinner with my friend, Patti, and our husbands, we couldn’t resist having our picture taken with our so-called host: Captain Bones.

Captain Bones gave us a hearty welcome as we walked through the front door of the restaurant. His smile was contagious, and we just couldn’t help but smile back.

He beckoned us to join him for a photo and we eagerly obliged.

Since we were early for our dinner reservation, Captain Bones offered to entertain us with a few of his tales from his days on the open waters, some of which pertained to Charlotte County where we lived.

“It was a long time ago,” he began, “but it seems like only yesterday. We was out fishin’ for whales.”

Patti and I looked at each other and thought, “Whales in Florida?” We’d never heard of whales in Florida before.

“I know whatcha thinkin’” he said in his raspy voice, “but whales had been seen off the coast of Florida and we was here to catch’em. Our only problem was that we came at the wrong time of year.”

Patti and I were still skeptical but decided to listen politely to his adventurous tale.

“Now, don’t go thinkin’ we was like that Ahab fella who had a one-track mind and couldn’t see beyond the nose on his face. If we saw a whale, we’d go after it. If we didn’t, well, then, we’d go after somethin' else, hopefully just a as big.”

Captain Ahab? How on earth did he know about Moby Dick? Moby Dick was written in 1850 and we were sure this guy was from a time period earlier than that. But, hey, this is my tale, so I guess anything is possible in my mind.

“So, we was out lookin’ for whales, like I said and saw this great big, beautiful fish jumpn’ in the water. At the time, we had no idea what it was but it sure was a beauty. We decided to go after it. Our boat wasn’t fast enough to catch it right away but as we was getting’ closer, the dark clouds started movin’ in.”

Okay, I’m thinking. Large fish, not a whale, but still big. Also, fast! Now a storm. Patti looked at me and we knew we were in for a vocalized ride, and we’d probably enjoy every word of it.

“Okay, time for a break. I think we all could use us a pint of ale,” the old Captain said.

“What, no rum?” I asked him amused at his choice of beverage.

“Nope, little lady. I enjoy my ale, but we’ll order beer seein’ as how you’re both dressed too nice for a pirate’s sharp ale.”

We smiled and ordered our beers. We’d forgotten to ask how much longer it would be before we could be seated and order our dinner.

Our beers were brought to us, and Captain Bones continued with his story.

“The ship began to rock this away. Then roll that away. The thunder roared and the wind howled. The rain came down in such heavy torrents it was almost blindin’ us. It felt like icicles were hittin’ our faces. Poor Devin. He was throwed overboard. We never did find him, but rumor has it he made it to shore somewhere near what is now called Key West and started his fishin’ charter service. Stupid name for a town but hey, what do I know? Right? Don’t look like no key to me! Then, we lost William but we kinda think he grabbed one o'them old timbers and headed to shore. Weren’t no storm when he went missin’.”

Patti and I listened intently, and I wished I’d been able to write down all he said. He was truly amazing and had so many stories.

He told us about the woman he almost married but sadly said, “We wasn’t meant to wed. I loved the sea too much and she didn’t love me enough. Just the way things worked out. Last time I saw her she was marryin’ old Tom. Well, he weren’t old when she was marryin’ him. But they did make a fine lookin’ couple. I kinda envied him but they went in one direction, back to his house to start their new lives and I went back to my ship to start another journey. I often wondered if she ever thought of me. Ah, well, such is the life of a sea-farin’ man!”

I looked at Patti and she looked at me, each wondering where we’d heard that phrase before but couldn’t quite place it.”

As Captain Bones was winding up his latest story, the server approached.

“Your table is ready. If you’d all follow me, I can seat you immediately.”

As we turned to thank Captain Bones for his stories, he somehow looked different. His eyes held a blank stare; his mouth was no longer curled into a smile; he looked frozen in time.”

“Patti, did we just imagine this entire thing?”

“Uh, I don’t know for sure, but I do know that it’s your story, so you tell me.”

We smiled at each other, looked back at Captain Bones, then turned and followed the server to our table for what turned out to be a most magnificent dinner.

The last time we visited the restaurant, which was about two years later, Captain Bones was no longer in the corner where we’d last seen him. I asked the server what happened to him.

“Captain who?” she asked.

“The statue of the old sea captain,” I explained.

“Oh honey, you must be thinking of a different restaurant. We haven’t had such a statue here in about twenty years.”

I looked at Patti and she shrugged her shoulders and said once again, “Hey, what can I tell you. It’s your story. Not mine.”