The sound is earsplitting. Thump thump…thump thump… thump thump…thump thump I must close my eyes, pinching my eyelids with my fingertips, leveling pressure is needed at times to leave this reality. The sound seems much closer today. I wonder how long it will stay this time. The burning smell that always accompanies the deafening sounds are not so bad today. The smell reminds me of when a small piece of clothing would get stuck in a dryer before the sensors would turn the machine off. To feel the hot burning piece of clothing are just memories. With the vibration that of a drum line… pounding deafening sound. The world has changed so that we may never return to that world of enjoying washer and dryers. Clean running water and not to feel of the mist that runs down the flat wall of glass that covers our world now. For as long as one can wander before the sound that stops us. To retreat to the tunnels that protect us. The mist seems to come with the far running water sound.
The running water sound is far far away from the echoes that deafen me. My eyes want to open but still cannot as so many times before, my body crawls towards the tunneling. I feel the walls, they are cold, so cold my hands feel wet. I glimpse down every time to see that they are not wet, just so cold from the metal that covers the walls. I squander around in the tunnel before the strong heavy winds add to the deafening sounds of the drum (largest drum in a band find out the name, preclusion???) beat that carries my whole soul. I am at peace here till am able to return to the area where I may squint as to see her again. To see her just once will bring the rainbows back. The hummingbirds pecking at the colorful flowers that bloomed in my world. The fresh taste of cut grass. I remember lying with her looking up at the beautiful sky that warmed our delicate skin. Turning us a golden pink tone. Oh, I miss the smells the most. If I ever get back to that world, may I never dismiss the beautiful rainbows in the skies.
I still wander how our world has evolved since, since the fall of what is known today as that side. NORMAL. The normal can be remembered as the calm. I wonder if we will get a glimpse of the others today. The reflective flashes on the panes of glass will shimmer at first then with the right light will display to us her and the others.
The water sound has left, I must get to the opening in the tunnel to see her… to see them… they start out close with light moving through the glass spark flares and lines their world … we see them… I she her. Today we are able to see all there is to see. We see green grass like back in the day. There go the hummingbirds pecking at the flowers. I look to the others to see if they see what I see, and they have gone off to the other side of this world. (My daughter and son in law holding a smaller similar version) They must have been able to pass out of the other opening of the tunneling. Come close I say to the others. Please come closer. They all rise their hands to their mouths to say something … and then to their ears... like they cannot hear us. I touch the pane of glass closet to her. Her image is familiar to me. Her hair if brushed with soft colors of brown and golden-brown highlights. She reaches up on her side. She begins to shake her head in disbelief. Disbelief of what…?
The light is really shining in today… she gone but we are now in full view of what creates the loud drum deafening sound. The wind creator. I cannot believe my eyes. I eyes are deceiving me. Can it be? I am merely an image. An Image locked. We are reflections of a side to only what can be described as an opened heart shaped locket.
The creature that holds the heart shaped locket holds it open today and really close to her face. I feel I knew her. Her eyes are aged with lines. Skin soft and translucent with small veins peering through. For the first time since the feeling of my world that seem to no longer exist is now clear to me to have only been an illusion and I am of a photo in the silver heart shaped locket that this familiar creature holds and wears close to her own heart. Removing it daily as to protect its fragile casing from that loud far away water sound of her taking a shower. The loud beats are of her heart beating through the silver heart shaped photo case. With her skin warming up the silver metal casing, creating the burning warm familiar scent. The wind that is so loud is her moving us to what is seen now, as a clear glass jewelry dish on the bathroom counter. She sits with us looking at her opposite of me. Her looking at herself at an earlier time in life. But who is the other one familiar to me…? I hear her speak to the locket and say, “I love and miss you Lil’ baby!” There is a voice or sound really far away saying something… I beg for it to come closer. The creature says, “what is it you speak ??” I said, “I miss and love her too!” It is clear the locket holds that of an image of someone baby. My baby is clearly looking at me. The creature that has been a slight version of her but me in a world that of myself or itself. I dreamed of the world close to my baby. My baby that was taking way too early. This world holds strong feelings, to touch these feeling that are only of my dream world or imaginary world. I can feel her heartbeat that now not so loud to the other side of the silver heart shaped locket I am in. She speaks to me, “mom you look after our little one till I join you both.” The small pane of glass has a reflection of me nodding up and down as to say, “yes” I will! As the locket is now clear to my eyes, is closing with her, “my grandbaby on the other side, giggles back!