Numbers Are the Death of Some

Josh was getting old, but it never showed.

To others, he was just another 27-year-old living among modern day society while the population grew rapidly in the world with every passing second.

Josh didn't really mind though, even though he had outlived all of his family, friends, and lovers.

All of them had grown confused by his ageless appearance as they neared the end of their lives, and he could never give an explanation why because cheating death did not seem like a plausible thing. It was his own decision to discreetly absorb any life energy he could with a light touch unbeknownst to the victim, but he didn't want to stop.

He never wanted to stop. He wanted to live forever.

He would live forever. Long enough to see the world on judgement day, then he would be back with everyone he knew in his lifetime.

But not yet. Not for a long time.

Josh celebrated his 200th birthday, alone. His wife had passed away 110 years ago at the incredible age of 90. He could always tell from her eyes that she knew exactly what his ability was, yet she never mentioned it whenever he unwillingly took tiny amounts of life energy from her every day. She was one of the few people from his generation that he still thought of, and missed terribly.

Now he was sitting by himself in the dark with a flickering '200' candle on a sad-looking store-bought cake. The house was quiet, but his thoughts were loud. For the longest time he acknowledged his miserable loneliness, yet he was too addicted to life to give it up.

"I wish I could stop." Josh mumbled out his wish, blowing out the candles and watching the smoke disperse around the empty living room. Looking around, he realized how depressed he had been ever since he lost Jenna.

He couldn't stop living now though; he didn't want to die alone. If he would have stopped taking life energy from people when he was the same age as Jenna, then he could have actually grown old with her and died of old age years ago. Taking his own life didn't feel like a feasible solution for this problem either.

Without bothering to cut himself a piece, he left the cake on the table and retreated to his bedroom. It was so empty without another body, and he shivered.

▫ ▫ ▫

Pulling on his hoodie and beanie, Josh found himself walking to the city park once again. It was his feeding ground, but these complete strangers didn't know he was pickpocketing them of life energy with every touch.

Each person that passed, he would strike up a random conversation with them, and end it with a simple handshake. Each time he shook their hands, he felt a surge of energy course through his veins, granting him a few extra months past his expiration date. He did this daily. He was an addict, he realized.

A street performer near the grass had been eyeing him all morning, casting him weird glances occasionally from a distance. The man sat on the curb while he drummed away on his small set of drums, his wavy dark brown hair bouncing with every movement. Josh tried to ignore him for as long as he could, but his eyes always drifted back to Mr. Tattoo man.

As both men collected their own kind of profits from bystanders, the day stretched on until the crowds in the area seemed to dwindle. When Josh glanced in the direction of the young drummer, he found that the man was staring back at him too. He had stopped drumming to take a breath; his eyes penetrating into Josh.

Josh quickly shoved his hands in his hoodie pocket. His stomach quivered as an uneasy feeling passed through him, locking eyes with the man to deliver a kind grin and nod.

The drummer looked around to see if the gesture was meant for someone else, but when he realized it was for him he returned a bright smile. It made Josh aware of a feeling he must have recognized from 173 years ago when he first met Jenna, but he pushed it down thinking it was just hunger. He hadn’t eaten anything for several years.

Why, he asked himself, were his legs now walking him over to the young performer behind the drums?

The drummer looked up with widened eyes as Josh stopped in front of his drum set, revealing his teeth in a glowing, crinkly smile.

"Hi!" The drummer said warmly, playing with the drumsticks in his hand.

"Hello." Josh was close to tearing the skin of his hands inside his hoodie, but he managed to calmly meet the eyes of the drummer. He asked himself again why he was willing to open up to a person like this when he was still mourning the loss of Jenna. "How's business for you today?" Josh asked casually, dropping a five-dollar bill he found in his pants pocket into the drummer's red solo cup on the ground that contained only a few coins.

The drummer smiled again. "It's going great, thank you." He went back to hitting his drums, as if a private show for Josh as a thank you for the donation.

Josh sat on the ground a few feet from the drum set and watched the man play for what felt like hours, intrigued by the rhythmic beats of each drum and the movements of the drummer's muscles. They stayed like this even when the crowds returned; Josh missing the opportunities to leech off people just so he could listen to the man play.

When the drummer finished his solo, the audience that had gradually gathered erupted in applause, some people actually dropping bills into the now overflowing cup of money before they dispersed once again. Josh continued to clap loudly as he stood up and the drummer gazed at him with appreciation.

"That was awesome dude!" Josh praised him.

"It helped that you sat there! It got the attention of people passing by." The drummer stood up from his seat and sighed, wiping his forehead with the hand that held the drumsticks and reached out with the other hand. "I'm Donny. I've been playing around here for months just to afford a cup of ramen each night."

Josh laughed and grasped the drummer's sweaty hand. "Joshua."

"Nice to meet you, Josh."

Josh didn't let go of the hand just yet. He was waiting for the life energy of Donny to transmit to his own body, the goal being to get another year of life added to his youth. But to Josh's shock, he wasn't feeling any energy.

Donny had looked down at the hand that was now tightly grabbing his hand out of impulse, his face unreadable. Josh began to panic, fingers slightly trembling. What was wrong with him?

The drummer looked back up at him with a timid smile, obviously a bit uncomfortable. Josh reached behind himself blindly to touch a random person's shoulder with his free hand, relief passing through him when he felt their life energy transmit through his fingertips. However, still no energy was pulsating from Donny.

Josh forced himself to let go of his hand, trying to calm himself from his bewilderment while Donny stood unfazed. Maybe he thought Josh's little petrified reaction was cute.

It bothered Josh though. It was such a foreign feeling to him now when he couldn't feel the energy of a human body transmit to himself. It had become a normal thing, but this was the first time in his life his ability was useless towards another person, and it was very unsettling. Donny himself couldn't have acted more undisturbed.

They remained in silence for a few moments before Donny finally spoke. "Do you want to get some lunch? You've been out here for a few hours like me without eating."

Josh forced a smile. "Yeah. That'd be great."

▫ ▫ ▫

Donny had poured all the money from his red cup and stuffed it into his pockets, leaving his drum set on the sidewalk of the park before they rushed across the street to an In-n-Out Burger.

After they ordered, they picked two empty window seats and began talking as if they had been friends for years. With their conversation and laughter, Josh felt the misery he had been feeling for years slightly ebb away. Hopefully this was just the start of a great friendship between them, but he unintentionally found himself thinking back to his cold, half-empty bed at home.

Josh glanced at Donny while they ate, studying his every movement while he took a bite out of his burger and a sip from his drink. What made him different from other people scared Josh, yet completely intrigued him to know why. He set his food on the table and gently brushed his shoulder against the other as he sat down. Donny didn't react; he just continued to eat and look out the window even when Josh didn’t move away for several seconds.

"So, Josh." Donny wanted to start up another conversation with the guy who had just awkwardly invaded his bubble longer than comfortable. "You just hang out in the park all day and greet strangers?"

Josh wanted to hit himself. Of course it always looked odd, and it wasn't the first time someone directly asked about his willingness to shake the hands of so many people with no clear purpose. "...Yeah. I like meeting people."

Donny just chuckled in response. "You must fall in love a lot then."

Josh wanted to choke on his fries. "What makes you think that?"

"Well if you're social enough to greet random strangers, you must get to know people very well on a personal level." Donny set down his burger and chewed on his lip as he thought. "I mean, I'm 28 and I have been drumming in parks pretty much every day for about a year, and yet you're the first person I've actually had a conversation with. People around here don’t like bothering street performers. I think they think it’s rude.”

Josh wanted to pass out.

He really liked this drummer though, and the way Donny smiled made him look like the kind of person that was always happy with life despite his situation. His gauge earrings, ruffled wavy hair, and a tattooed galaxy on his entire right arm made Josh admire him even more. "People have become even more anti-social over the years.” He said. “They just need to look up more from technology.”

"That’s why you talk to them?" Donny asked. "Sort of like reminding them of what’s real?”

“Exactly. Meeting people outside your immediate family is how you form relationships that can last beyond a lifetime.” Josh thought about Jenna, his parents, all his friends that came and went. Despite what he just said, having conversations with people never motivated him to keep those relationships. There wasn’t really any point. He would outlive all of them a thousand times over.

Donny was looking at him. “Very true. You’re wise. And you're what? Around 25? You sound like a major in communications.” He joked.

"I'm...ah.." Josh gulped. "I just t-turned 27 y-yesterday." He just lied to Donny and he immediately felt guilt wash over him. “And I gave up on college a while back.”

"Then you seem like a regular person who knows how important it is to make friends and find love in life. You're only 27, and for all I know you have your whole life figured out already."

But Josh could only nod. How could he explain to Donny all that he's experienced? How can he explain he's falling into the same cycle once more? That humanity was destined to repeat history, only in worsening versions? Or admit he might be falling in love again?

Only 172 years older than this person he liked so much already. The age gap was incredibly terrifying.

▫ ▫ ▫

Weeks went by with a normal routine established between the two. Josh would wake up out of his cold bed and rush to get two cups of coffee at Starbucks, then meet Donny at the same location in the park. The drummer would have his percussion already set up and give Josh the sweetest grin after his friend slung an arm over his shoulder in a welcoming hug. He assumed Donny thought he was just being friendly, and that was partly true, but he was also still trying to feed off him. He never stopped questioning what was wrong with his abilities when he tried to make contact with the drummer. Despite that, they laughed more together each day as Josh felt his misery slowly fade, and he hoped there was something lovely forming between them. He couldn't have asked for someone better to help him reconnect with his own life.

Everyday now, Josh would continue to admire the man drumming his heart out in the park. He would continue to talk to people, but he kept his eyes locked on Donny. They spent their hours like this; Donny being the only one making money and buying the daily lunches that Josh began to feel ashamed.

"Where do you want to go today?" Donny was gathering up his possessions and collected the cash out of the cup around noon that day.

"Actually.." Josh started, shifting on his feet. "How about we go to my place? We can order pizza and watch a movie.”

"Hang out at your house?" Donny's eyes lit up. "I thought you'd never ask!"

They somehow managed to defy the odds and stuff Donny's drums into the backseat of Josh's car on the drive home. Josh's mind was whirling with excitement. This would be the first company he had in many years ever since the last person he knew from his youth had died.

It felt so strange to lead Donny into his house, not sure of what else to do other than to immediately place the order for pizza that wouldn't be here for a while due to the extravagant things they wanted on it. He wanted to treat Donny in return for all the nice things he'd done for him already.

Josh splayed out on the couch as he watched Donny look around at all the things that lined his walls and shelves of the living room like it was a museum, actually looking fascinated. It didn't even occur to Josh that the things that collected dust on his bookshelves were decades old, and photos of his family and friends radiated nostalgic feelings from the quality of cameras used at the time.

"Dude," Josh saw that Donny had picked up his old iPhone 7 that was lying on the middle shelf. "Where on earth did you get a relic like this?"

Josh's heart began to pound as Donny gently held the 173 year old piece of technology in his hands. He cleared his throat. "Online auction."

He wasn't lying though. At the time, he had gotten it online, but Donny was thinking it must have been an expensive auction for an ancient phone.

"2016, right?" Donny asked. "I remember I had one of these. It’s insane how far technology has come.”

Before Josh could process if he misheard Donny, the doorbell rang and Josh bounded for the door to thank and pay the delivery guy.

Donny had set down the phone on the table and the two made themselves comfortable on the couch, grabbing big pieces of the pizza while they watched whatever

"Better than ramen?" Josh smiled after Donny finished up his fourth piece. He didn't realize Donny had actually been looking thinner lately.

Donny nodded, swallowing. "Much better." With his eyes pretending to be transfixed on the tv, Donny scooted a little closer to Josh. It made Josh's heart flutter as he desperately longed for genuine human contact. Not just light touches on people's shoulders, but contact shared between two people to heal the loneliness that had been eating away at his stomach in the years since his wife died.

Donny might have read his mind, curiously gesturing to some of the hanging photos. "Who's the woman with you in some of the pictures?"

Obviously, Donny had not seen the wedding photo on the coffee table beside Josh. He glanced down at it. "She was my wife."

Donny immediately turned to Josh in shock, only now noticing the wedding band he wore on his left hand. "I'm so sorry. I didn't know." His expression was sympathetic, maybe because he thought Josh had become a widower at such a young age. "I didn't mean to intrude like this."

Or maybe he thought he was still married.

Even after 110 years, Josh still wasn't ready to take off the ring. But here he was now, feeling a tug in his heart toward the drummer sitting quietly beside him, unsure now of what to say.

"It's fine. I don't mind when people ask about her." No one had asked about her for so long. He barely socialized and became too isolated to remember all his friends who had once been strangers themselves.

Donny remained silent, and Josh felt his hand snapping up to latch securely onto the other's shoulder, throat tightening. His addiction was his form of comfort. When all his worries came piling back in his mind, he really didn’t talk to people to be kind. He talked to them to survive. Where was all of Donny's life energy? Why couldn't he feel it? Was his ability wearing off? Was he finally dying?

"Josh, stop it."

Josh looked up at Donny, dazed from his harsh tone. He retracted his hand.

Donny's eyebrows were furrowed, not out of anger, but with a look of sincere empathy. "I know what you're doing. You can control it.”

Words refused to come to Josh's mouth; finding it difficult to process he had finally been discovered. After all these years, he found a person he couldn't feed on, and he had been caught by his own bait he threw out on a line.

"Control what?" He rasped. It wasn’t a question.

"I know you're trying to feed on me."

"How...?" Josh stopped himself and shook his head. "I'm sorry, Don."

Donny didn't respond, but strangely enough his warm expression contained signs of happiness. The drummer must have seen the tears forming in Josh's eyes because in the next moment Donny had reached over to gently pull him into a hug. Josh felt his heart might burst from happiness, or completely shatter from sadness. Donny was hugging him, and there was no supernatural energy that came with it. It was the best damn thing he had ever felt in his life. Misery had finally vanished and the desperate need to hold someone just for life energy faded away like water on hot concrete.

He relaxed, melting deeper into Donny's form as his heartbeat pounded out of his chest. Donny wasn't like other people he met in his 200-year life. Donny had his own ability that prevented Josh from taking any of his energy, but it wasn't just that.

Donny pulled away and looked at him with soft eyes. "Josh. How old are you really?"

Josh shook his head, feeling more tears bead in his eyes. "I turned 200 a few weeks ago." He choked out. "I can take anyone's life energy just to live a bit longer." He just wanted to disappear into the shadows of his cold house and sob away his pain until he exhausted himself to sleep. "I learned it was best for me not to get attached to people that I could lose. Which was everyone.” He gulped. “You can leave, Don. I'll completely understand."

It was quiet. He didn't hear any response. Donny was just gazing at him when eventually his sweet crinkly smile rose on his lips. "Josh, I want to stay, if you'll have me." He shifted so he could see his face but still hold him. "I finally found someone I can live a long life with."

Josh looked up at him and tried to process why his words sounded as if they contained more meaning than the average person would interpret them as. And he suddenly knew why.

"How old are you Don?"

"200.” He smiled. “And a half."