Lucky No. 9
a microfiction heist story

"Why?"
The question had been posed countless times and never once had he answered.
The Inspector's fist slammed against the table.
"Just tell me why. I cannot for the life of me figure it out."
His request was met with a blank stare.
"Have it your way. Lock him up! And throw him in the Block this time," he raged, storming from the room.
The smallest smile stole across Tristan's face.
Nine was his lucky number. It was the amount of times he'd stolen and returned the Inspector's car.
And it had finally landed him here, the only place in the city that met his needs. One–it had the necessary power supply. Two–he could gain access with a little creativity.
Tristan chuckled imagining the Inspector's surprise when he put it together. Stealing the car was just to fuck with him, but the key was literally the key to leaving this world behind.
He quickly removed the crystal hidden in the fob, touched the Block and pulled hard on its power. In moments, a fuzzy portal solidified.
Yes!
But movement drew his eye as the Inspector rushed him, grabbing the crystal and diving through the rapidly closing portal.
"Thanks, son."
Son?
___________________________________________________
I had so much fun with this one, I decided to expand it. You can continue Tristan's story by clicking here:
Reader insights
Outstanding
Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!
Top insights
Excellent storytelling
Original narrative & well developed characters
Heartfelt and relatable
The story invoked strong personal emotions
Easy to read and follow
Well-structured & engaging content
Compelling and original writing
Creative use of language & vocab
On-point and relevant
Writing reflected the title & theme
Expert insights and opinions
Arguments were carefully researched and presented
Eye opening
Niche topic & fresh perspectives
Masterful proofreading
Zero grammar & spelling mistakes
Comments (44)
good one
Dear H - You always 'Heist' my attention with 'Blank Stares' Jay
I must have been on vacation when this (and part 2) came out!! 🤯. Loving it!!
Haha great twist!
That was so good, I love the cliff hanger.
Awesome 😎 I didn’t see that coming until the end 👀Great Story❤️📝‼️
Super original and yes, I'm glad you decided to continue the story!
Love the journey this one took us on, Heather! Outstanding use of so few words to create such a fleshed-out-feeling tale. Great job and congrats on a very worthy TS for this one 👏
This is really cool! I want more. <3
OMGOSH!! This was such a great mystery in such a short time. I can't stop thinking about it. I had one of those: "Luke, I AM your father" moments. LOL! love, LOve LOVE this! ❤️
Son WHAT did not see that coming great Job Heather!
Nice twist!
This article is really fascinating.
I absolutely love the premise of time travel mingled with a heist! Masterfully done, friend!
Whoaaaaa! You gotta write a full fledged story for this! This is just too interesting too leave as a microfiction! You are the bomb! Heather my friend, my sweet fear friend, my looney partner, my favourite nerd, pleaseeee, pwetty pweaseeee write a full story to this 🥺🥺🥺🥺
Now that was unexpected. Never try to play a player. And remember, everything you're trying to get away with, your dad's probably already done.
I’m with everyone else. This was great and could easily be made into a longer piece/sci-fi movie. Congrats on a well- deserved top story!
It was very good!
Oh!!! Heather I’m gunna need more of this story! That was a perfect taster to make me want a follow up or prequel! I love the narrators voice and sense of humour, but also that twist at the end was just unbelievable!! Great story!!
Oooooh. Very intriguing twist at the end! Congratulations on Top Story.
I will sound like a broken record, but I loved the twist! Didn’t see it coming, but the magic of it was set up so nicely. Great work! Maybe we’ll see Tristan and the Inspector again… 🤗😁
Excellent twist! I can't wait to read more.
Like father, like son situation. Interesting twist. Wonder where he went.
Oooo. Like it! Great twist.
Awesome!!! Congratulations on Top Story!!!❤️❤️💕