I am a War Survivor

There were a few white clouds scattered here and there like beautiful seagulls invading the ocean… It was a typical day in the city…. It is Damascus, the oldest capital in the world, or the sister of history, as we called our beloved city.

At that moment, all of Syria was engulfed in war, with Damascus somewhat less affected, as I thought. Although I knew that some neighborhoods in Damascus were being used to clashes from time to time between government forces and rebels, I had no idea what it would be like to witness one of these mind-blowing events.

It was a spring day in March 2013, and I was driving near newly announced clashes areas ( without knowing of course) when a thunderous sound sounded…or so I thought. Bullets shattered the rear window glasses into thousands of pieces.

The car crossed the pavement into a garden after I lost control. There was a stop in the car, but not a stop in the bullets. I only subconsciously opened the door, covered my head, and hid next to the car. It was a sniper, I believed. In front of me, I saw three blood-stained bodies. It appeared that they were killed recently…

In a garden of “death” under that sky of March, I made every effort to hide and gather myself. In the first 3–4 minutes after what happened, gathering the glasses from the car’s rear window would be much easier than gathering my scattered pieces. Through my watch ( Although its glasses were also partially damaged in the accident, it continued to function ), I only knew that it had been 3–4 minutes. These minutes seemed like a decade or maybe a lifetime to me.

“ Time is very slow for those who wait Very fast for those who are scared Very long for those who lament very short for those who celebrate But for those who love, Time is eternal.” William Shakespeare

During those moments, I had countless eye-opening deep thoughts. Among them was the fact that if war attacks, the sky shouldn’t be cloudy or red! The seasons, air, water, sky, and gardens continue to play their role even during wartime. My head was filled with scenes from (Saving Private Ryan ) and other war movies where nature echos the darkness of war, but reality seemed to be different as war and death can go hand in hand under the sky of spring.

In the middle of a sea of thousand thoughts, I noticed the music in the car was continuing. Out of the blue, the music became the only sound I could hear in my head. My ears seemed to be the only functioning organ in my body! I stopped smelling the unpleasant smells coming from the garden of death. I just heard Chris De Burg singing “ There are those who fail, there are those who fall, there are those who will never win. Then there are those who fight for the things they believe and these are men like you and me.”

It’s hard for me to describe the sudden strength I had. It felt like I was repeating myself like you and me, you and me…. I was covered in sweat, glasses, blood, and scratches. It was lucky for me not to have a major injury after touching my head, face, chest, and limbs.

My car was stopped and my glasses were broken, but the bullets did not break my Pandora box that seemed still full of hope.

I had to plan how I would make it while I was on the ground. The weird thing is that I used to manage projects where time and plans were everything. It was paradoxical at that moment that I needed both a plan and time to survive.

Again, it was so quiet. Despite being too silent and too painful, my brain began to function properly again. There seemed to be no serious clashes yet, but they would very soon. I just had to cross the garden and the road to be out of the sniper’s reach. It’s always better to go back from where you came from when you’re in such a situation.

Slowly, like a 9-month-old baby, I crawled, but not surely since nothing is certain under the grim reaper’s scythe. Through the glass, blood, soil, grass, and asphalt, I crawled. Reaching my goal required more or less six or seven meters. In a flash, I felt like my left ear was exploding…..a bullet was maybe 5–10 centimeters away…I ran like Carl Lewis (the fastest man of our generation). Although I was far away from the area, I kept running like crazy… I made it and I became a war survivor.

My life has been drastically changed as a result of this experience. While I don’t claim to understand life better than others, I believe that when circumstances put you on the verge of death and you recovered, you discovered more of the value of life and its beauty.

It is worthy to live life so intensely. Every day is simply a grace that I learn to enjoy. As much as possible, I try to learn, help others, focus on what I want and love, and stay away from all negative people & energies.

Although the echo of the crazy bullet still sometimes invaded my left year, I feel life whispering to me all the time that I had the chance to live again.

There is no doubt in my mind that whispers of life will always triumph over the ugly sounds of war

Kindly follow me on Twitter