Headspace

Claudia sat on the ugly couch in her parents' equally ugly living room while her father looked over her report card. She didn't have to ask his opinion; she could tell from his furrowed brow and widening frown.

Claudia tried to head her dad off. “Look, I know it's not that great...”

“That's an understatement!” her father interrupted. “How could you be screwing up this much in your Junior year?”

Claudia protested, “But what about the A's I'm getting in Home Ec.? No complements for that?”

“Anyone can pass Home Ec. easily,” her mother retorted, poking her head out of the kitchen door. “Passing Auto Shop would be more impressive.”

“You'd better get your little sister to tutor you,” her dad remarked.

Claudia blew it off. “Caroline has enough to do.”

Ain't that the truth, Claudia thought, her head filling with jealous rage. She gets to be the smart and talented one, the one Mom and Dad are always fawning over, and I get to be the trash. God has a sick sense of humor.

“I don't want to hear that,” her father snapped. “You're not gonna repeat Junior year.”

Claudia jumped to her feet and shouted, “YOU KNOW HOW EMBARRASSING IT WOULD BE FOR A FRESHMAN TO BE TUTORING A JUNIOR???”

Her dad was about to get up, but her mom stepped in between them, glaring at Claudia.

“You know how embarrassing it would be for your little sister to be in the same grade as you because you kept screwing up?” her mom whispered coldly. “You will get help from her, and that's final. Now, go to your room and open your books.”

Claudia got one last look at the venom on her parents faces before heading to her room.

~-~-~-~

Dinner that night was pure misery for Claudia. She could only stew in her hatred while barely touching her bowl of beef stew. She did her best to ignore Caroline excitedly talking about getting on the “A” Honor Roll again, getting a major part in the Drama Club's production of Our Town, and getting first violin in the school orchestra. Claudia didn't know what she wanted to do more, dump her nearly full bowl of stew on Caroline or slap her parents the next time they grinned at their precious Caroline's next Look at me; I'm perfect! remark. However, the sound of Claudia's name snapped her out of her reverie.

“What?” Claudia said.

Her mother huffed. “Wake up! I was just telling Caroline that she needed to help you.”

Caroline piped up. “I've got a couple of hours after rehearsals Thursday. Can we do it then?”

Claudia sneered, “Suit yourself.”

“Okay,” Caroline acknowledged before polishing off her dinner and getting up. “I've gotta study for tomorrow's test.”

After Caroline left, Claudia's mom turned and glared at her. “You could be a little more grateful.”

Claudia bolted up, almost knocking her bowl over. “You got what you wanted. 'Little Miss Perfect' is tutoring Thursday. Need me to feed her grapes, too?”

Claudia dashed from the dining room before her parents could respond and locked herself in her room. She threw herself on her bed, seething with contempt for the rest of her family, especially “Little Miss Perfect”.

Then, Claudia got an idea. It's time for her to become a little less perfect, Claudia thought as she drifted off to a night of restless sleep.

~-~-~-~

Claudia may not have been able to solve quadratic equations for her algebra class, but she knew which students to talk to when she needed a certain something. Using some of the money she made working part-time at a grocery store and connections she was pointed toward, she got a hold of a small supply of magic mushrooms. She returned home before her parents got home from work and got started on what she hoped would be the perfect revenge for her perfect little sister.

When her parents and Caroline returned home, they found Claudia in the kitchen hard at work at the oven.

“What are you doing?” her mom asked suspiciously.

“I'm making dinner and dessert. I got plenty of practice in Home Ec. and wanted to share what I learned,” Claudia replied. She turned and looked pleadingly at her mother before asking, “That's not a problem, is it?”

“That sounds good,” Caroline answered before their mother could speak.

“Okay. It'll be ready in a few minutes,” Claudia said.

As Caroline and their mom stepped out of the kitchen, Claudia got back to work with a wicked smile on her face.

~-~-~-~

Fifteen minutes later, the four members of the family were relaxing at the table after finishing their helpings of baked ziti. Claudia offered seconds.

“No, thanks,” Caroline sighed. “If I have any more, I won't be able to fit into my costume.”

Claudia started to cringe at the mention of the play, but she caught herself. “Well, I hope everyone saved room for dessert, at least.”

Claudia ducked into the kitchen. About five minutes later, she returned with a tray. It had four plates, each with a slice of cake and a matching scoop of ice cream. Three of them had strawberry while the fourth plate had enough chocolate in the cake, icing, and ice cream to make Willy Wonka sick.

“I'm guessing the chocolate is mine?” Caroline asked.

“Yeah,” Claudia answered dismissively. “You were always the chocoholic in the house.”

The four dug into their respective dessert dishes. Claudia stole plenty of glances as Caroline chowed down on her chocolate cake and ice cream. She couldn't resist smiling a little. With all the psilocybin Claudia put in the batter for that chocolate cake, Caroline's life looked to become much more... unpredictable.

~-~-~-~

After dinner, Caroline went to her room to work on an essay for history class the next day. It started easily enough; she had all her notes on Antietam ready. However, as she started writing, her head started to spin.

“No,” Caroline moaned. “Not a headache. Not now.”

She stumbled to the bathroom, dizzy enough to vomit, and grabbed some ibuprofen and a glass of water. After swallowing the medicine, Caroline relaxed a little, sure that the headache and dizziness would clear up in a few minutes. She returned to her room, trying hard not to throw up since it still felt like the world was spinning. She sat back down, closed her eyes, and took a few deep breaths, trying to relax and let the Advil do its job.

However, she heard a gunshot. Her eyes bolted open and, out of instinct, she ducked underneath her desk. She looked around and saw that she was just in her room. There was nothing else there.

“I must just be thinking about this essay too hard,” Caroline reasoned. “That battle must be in my head. I'd better finish the essay so I can stop thinking about it.”

Caroline started to write again. She got to writing the part about Major General Hooker's assault when the sounds of rifles started blasting in her ears. She clasped her hands to her ears to try to muffle the noise, but the blasts still rang in her eardrums. She clamped her eyes shut, hoping to will the noise to stop, but it only got louder.

Suddenly, there was a jab on the back of her neck. Instinctively, she grabbed the spot with her right hand and held tight. After a few moments, she pulled her hand away from her neck and looked at it. Her hand was covered in blood.

Screaming, Caroline ran back out to the living room and collapsed on the floor. Her parents, who were watching American Idol along with Claudia, rushed to her aid. Claudia looked on with interest.

“What's wrong?” her mom asked urgently.

“Shot!” Caroline yelled in a panic. “I got shot, General!”

“What?” her dad asked, confused. “What do you mean?”

“My neck!” Caroline continued to yell. “Bleeding! Where's the field medic?”

Her mother checked the spot on her neck Caroline mentioned. “Caroline, you just got bitten by a mosquito. It'll just itch for a while. Do you want some calamine lotion?”

Caroline looked frightened at her parents with no hint of recognition. “Get your heads down! Do you want those Confederates to shoot them off?”

Caroline's parents just looked at each other in complete confusion. Claudia, meanwhile, was watching intently, silently laughing at the chaos.

“What's wrong with her?” her dad asked her mom. “I know she had that Civil War essay to write, but this can't be part of the assignment. She's been working so hard. Could she be burning out?”

At those words, Caroline screamed and bolted back up. “Burn? General Lee's burning the area? I gotta get out of here! I've gotta warn General McClellan!”

With that, she ran out the front door as fast as she could, not even stopping to close it again. Her parents could only look confused at each other while Claudia continued to laugh quietly. Then, they all heard the sound of tires squealing outside the open door followed by a loud thump. Jaws dropping, all three ran out the front door. They barely had time for their eyes to adjust to the darkness when they saw what happened. Caroline was hit by a car.

~-~-~-~

A week after the funeral, Claudia sat quietly in her room thinking. The autopsy after Caroline died revealed the psilocybin in her system, but the doctors couldn't determine how it got there. It seemed like Claudia was in the clear. Her parents weren't even being their harsh selves anymore.

Claudia was snapped out of her thinking by a knock on the door.

“Come in,” she answered.

Her mother entered carrying what looked like an old shoebox. Her eyes were red and puffy. Claudia reasoned that she must've been crying.

“I was just going through your sister's room,” her mother said quietly. “I found this. I think she would've wanted you to have it.”

Claudia was confused as she took the box. Why would Caroline have something for her? After her mother stepped out of the room, closing the door behind her, Claudia opened the box. What she saw made her eyes fill with tears.

There were a number of trinkets about Claudia that Caroline kept. Pictures from a trip to the state fair when they were little. Index cards with recipes that Claudia had mastered. There were even a couple of Brownie merit badges that Claudia lost years ago.

Claudia started crying out loud. She was so absorbed in how jealous she was feeling about Caroline's accomplishments and how their parents were doting on her that she never realized that Caroline never stopped looking up to her. Though life would eventually go on, Claudia would carry the guilt for her misplaced vengeance for the rest of her life.

Like the story? Want more? Let me know, and take care of yourself.