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First time

—Atonement excerpt, Edward’s perspective

By Melissa IngoldsbyPublished about a year ago Updated about a year ago 6 min read
7
First time
Photo by DANNY G on Unsplash

After two or three weeks of living and working in our small Alaskan town, we finally settled in.

Things were looking up.

I got a job at a fish hatchery, and I also was doing handyman work for the building’s owner where we lived to help supplement the income.

John was working on his degree to get his Bachelor in Computer Applications, to see through to his dream of becoming a software engineer. This was going to take three years. In the meantime, he was also doing a part time job as a deckhand and was helping with our new life.

The psychiatrist I found for John early on when we first moved to this small town was actually quite discreet and very helpful. The last appointment he went to, which was about two weeks ago, he’s been on a much more steady course with his medication and not having such extreme anxiety. The nightmares are almost non-existent, and the sleep paralysis—which terrified me and scared me as I felt helpless to find a solution for him, is finally waning to a complete halt.

No more late night diner trips. I think he’s finally resting. And that helps us rest—it helps us heal. Thank goodness because I felt like my nerves were frazzled and near on edge, but I would’ve done it all again for him.

Also; all that physical outside work really tires him out.

I usually get home before him, so I make dinner and try to tidy up.

I see he is growing into someone more and more mature and independent everyday and I’m proud of him.

It’s getting close to his birthday and I want to give him a really nice celebration—cake, gifts, homemade card, the works.

I will definitely be planning things out.

I make a simple grilled chicken pasta and salad before he comes home and I see he looks bushed.

“Heya sweetie, I got dinner ready…” I say as I walks in, looking sweaty and tired.

He waves. “Aw, thanks,” he smiles, walking over and hugging me near the stove. He leans up on the balls off his feet and kisses my cheek. “How was your day, Edward?”

I shrug, leaning in to kiss him properly, and I hear him moan softly into the kiss.

“Hmm, not bad. Excellent now,” I say and he grins.

“Sorry I smell,” he says with a scrunched up nose, looking indirectly at his right armpit in a disgusted way.

“Naw, I don’t smell anything,” I rebuttle. “Just your natural musk.”

John rolls his eyes and sits at the kitchen table. “That is a weird sort of thing to say. BO isn’t my natural musk.”

I laugh. “I meant your general aroma. You have a sort of timber.. woodsy musk to you, normally.”

John chuckles, his expression in disbelief. “You like how trees smell? What does that even mean?”

I bring our plates to the table, and lean close to his face. “I love your tree smell.”

“Hmm. Ok, I’ll buy it.”

I laugh. “Want some lemonade?”

He nods. “Sure. Extra ice, please.”

I go to the fridge and get out the lemonade pitcher, but I sense his stare in me, and I feel my face and neck heating up.

As the cold rush of anxiety and fear has died down, there has been an intense uprising of heat between John and I. We’ve only really fooled around, and for me at least, this is the first time I taken such a slow process with my significant other to be truly intimately involved.

I noticed in his own stare when he thinks I’m not looking and the way he holds me at night, it is getting more and more authoritative and even sexual.

After we fall asleep, he turns his hands in toward my inner thigh, and circles it, then rests it so close to my aching member, and I know he’s wanting it as much as I do. But we don’t. But in the morning, during coffee and breakfast, it’s still there. That crushing sort of pining. That deep, high, raw, carnal energy that is felt in the air we shared, like atoms pulsing and connecting us.

Once I come back with our glasses full of lemonade, I feel this pull. The two glasses connect with a clink and the wood hits the bottoms. Suddenly I feel his arms wrap around my waist, and pulling me right on his lap.

“John! What?” I say in surprise and I turn around, a bit exasperated but then I see his face and I’m just in love all over again. His large amber eyes are like honey, so sweet and rich and full. I can’t stop looking into them, and I lean closer.

“Oh, Edward, I think I want you,” John whispers and I kiss his lips.

“John?” I breathe heavily, and I feel his hips move up against me, and it feels too good, but I still try to restrain myself from moving too much.

“I’m sorry..” John looks away, biting his lip, licking it softly. “I don’t know why I did that. I just.. I can’t stop thinking of you. All day at work. Even though I’m tired.” He moved his longer piece of bangs out of his face, his brownish wavy hair my undoing. I help him and put some behind his ear.

“Don’t apologize, my dear. Can we do this? Tonight? You know how badly I’ve been wanting you… right?” I whisper and press my groin into his, and we kiss gently.

John sighs with a slow smile. “Oh, babe, but I’m pooped.”

I laugh as I wrap my arms around his neck. “Pooped?! You cutie pie! That’s a good way to put it I’m sure. I never thought I would hear you say that.”

John softly chuckles, looking embarrassed.

“Shush. But I am.” He sighs, crossing his arms over his chest.

“I know. We should plan for a nice night. Go out for dinner and a movie. Have a great night. And then we go home..” I wink dramatically and click my tongue against my cheek. He shakes his head and laughs, gently pushing me away.

“It’s my first time, Edward..” he trails a soft line of kisses on my face.

“Same here,” I say and John gives me a unconvinced stare. I kiss his cheek and continue, “It’s my first time with someone like you. With a beautiful, intense, intellectual man—that I’m madly in love with.”

John blushes deep red. “Ah, Edward. You are a good liar.”

“You wound me! I am not a liar. Just because I was a lawyer, you think I lie all the time?” I mumble as I lay wet kisses into his neck, making him laugh hysterically.

“Stop!! You weirdo!” John tilts the chair and we almost fall, so I hold onto the table to keep our balance.

“I’m your weirdo!” I counter and he grins, nodding.

We relax a bit and kiss, and I sneak in my tongue.

Holding onto his sweet, angular, cute face, I feel our rumbling passions rumbling, and churning.

We slowly stop and I get up, and as I do, he grips onto my hands.

“Let’s do it tonight,” he says with a strange twist of confidence.

“You mean, it? The big one?” I tease and he sighs, his eyes fluttering.

“No Edward,” he gets up, and pulls me close, and I feel my heart beat pulsing with a gripping, perfect beat.

“I’m going to make love to you, my darling, and it’s going to be our first, and certainly not our last.”

His words floor me, and I feel so exhilarated.

This man is such a dreamboat—a crazy, wild, interesting, daring one, but one I wouldn’t trade for the world.

——

Author note: If you enjoyed this, please follow this link to catch up on the sequel to my story The Half Paper Moon, which is called Atonement on Amazon Kindle Vella. Here is the first novel where you can find here.

Thank you so much!

-Melissa

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About the Creator

Melissa Ingoldsby

I am a published author on Patheos.

I am Bexley is published by Resurgence Novels here.

The Half Paper Moon is available on Golden Storyline Books for Kindle.

My novella Carnivorous is to be published by Eukalypto soon! Coming soon

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Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

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  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  2. Easy to read and follow

    Well-structured & engaging content

  3. Excellent storytelling

    Original narrative & well developed characters

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    Arguments were carefully researched and presented

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Comments (5)

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  • Stephen Kramer Avitabileabout a year ago

    Wow you use such great descriptive language i really feel like I can see the scene unfolding! Excellent work!

  • Mariann Carrollabout a year ago

    Could not resist a romantic story ❤️

  • Oooo, this was soooo hot and intimate! Excellent job, Merly!

  • Gina C.about a year ago

    Aw! This is sweet, spicy, and a very delightful read. :) I enjoyed this very much!

  • ✨🍀👍

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