Fetching Flowers

“Beautiful service, huh?” Brian said in a low voice.

“Very beautiful,” Lisa replied, then stood solemnly in her black dress.

Then she says, “I really thought she was going to make it.”

“I know, we all did.”

“It feels so sudden.” Her vision was blurred slightly by the tears collecting in the corner of her eyes.

“We’ve already had this conversation, Lisa.”

“I know, I just don’t know what else to say.”

“There’s something else we need to talk about, now that Shannon has been laid to rest.”

Lisa knew this was about the affair. Her behavior and lies on the day of her mother’s death were coming back to haunt her. Every day since her mother’s parting she’s felt so heavy with guilt and grief. She believed her infidelity was in part cause of her mother’s death.

“Brian, I can explain.”

“Explain what?” Brian looked at her perplexed.

“Kevin is completely out of the picture. I was ending things with him, when I said I was going to fetch flowers for Mom.”

———

Lisa left Brian at the hospital to get fresh flowers from her mother’s garden. She kissed him goodbye.

When Lisa pulled into the driveway Kevin’s car was already parked on the street.

He turned off the car and walked over to climb into her passenger seat. He leaned over the console to kiss her. The kiss was soft and slow. She turned her face away to break the kiss.

“I can’t do this anymore,” she whispered.

“What are you talking about?”

“We need to end this.”

“We don’t need to end anything, what’s going on?”

“Kevin, I love my husband.”

“And I love you, you know this.”

He reached for her hand.

“It’s not right, and you know it.”

She pulled her hand out of his grasp and looked out the window away from him.

“Oh c’mon, this is bullshit. You’re not even giving me a real answer.”

“We both knew this would never last and you’re a fool if you thought it could.” Tears began to soak her face and she pawed them away to hide the pain.

“He will never be enough for you. You know that, don’t you? Why else would you turn to me?” Kevin’s jaw was set the way it used to when he’d lose his temper.

“It’s not his fault.”

“You’re right, it’s yours. Don’t forget that you pursued me.”

“I know, I know. And I’m sorry for letting this go on as long as I did.”

“Don’t pretend like you don’t feel what we have together!”

“I can’t keep loving you if it means hurting him.”

“I’ll pretend I believe that. What changed?”

“I came to my senses.”

Kevin scoffed.

“That’s funny. Sounds like you’re doing the opposite of listening to your senses.”

“Kevin, please.”

The phone rings through the car’s Bluetooth audio. Brian’s name shows up on the screen. She gives Kevin a look that pleads compliance. She presses a button on her steering wheel.

“Hey honey, what’s up?” Her voice cracks.

“You need to get back to the hospital. Shannon’s not doing well.” They can both hear the urgency in Brian’s voice through the car speakers.

“Alright, I’ll be right there.”

She hangs up and stares forward blankly. The two lovers sit in silence.

“Kevin, this is goodbye.”

He waited for her to look at him. She didn’t.

———

The look on Brian’s face was a mix between pain and realization. He knew things had been bad, but he thought it was because of Shannon’s cancer. It hadn’t occurred to him that she had been cheating.

“Lisa—”

“No, I’m done with the lies. I can’t stand to hurt you, but I promise it’s over. I felt like we had lost touch with one another, and—”

“Lisa, that’s not—”

“It will never happen again, I love you. I love our family. I was just lost.”

Brian stopped trying to speak and stood there stoically. The pain apparent on his face moments ago was replaced by a blank stare. He held his breath for a moment, trying to settle on what to say.

“I was going to say we need to talk about Shannon’s will.”

Now it was Lisa who was standing horrified. The tears that had been building up, raced down her face in single black mascara filled lines.

“Oh my god,” she says, “you didn’t know.”

She gasps for air, and her cries pulse through her body.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to tell you like this.”

He looks at her skeptically.

“Were you ever going to tell me?”

“Yes,” she hiccups from the tears.

“Don’t lie to me.”

“No, well I wanted to, but I didn’t think I could. I was afraid it would hurt you.”

It’s Brian’s turn to scoff.

“You were afraid of hurting me?”

He stares her down, astonished at the difference between woman he believed her to be and the woman standing in front of him.

“I love you. I love our family. I don’t want to lose you.”

Brian doesn’t speak for a moment. His stillness is unsettling for Lisa.

“You still love me. Tell me you still love me?”

Brian begins nodding and takes a deep breath. Lisa lets out a sigh of relief. He opens his arms to embrace his wife, she leans in and tilts her head up to meet his lips. When their lips connect he can taste the salt from her tears, and his own hurt comes back to him. He pulls away from the kiss and looks away. A moment later he says:

“I want a divorce.”