Escape
An excerpt from my novel Atonement, the sequel to my novel The Half Paper Moon(heavily modifed for the challenge)
They were in a beat up Chevy pick up truck and on the run.
It was a silent ride early in the morning when he first escaped with his love, and Edward had his hands on the driver’s wheel with a death grip. Fresh out of the prison setting, John seemed in a catatonic state as soon as they hit the road. Moving out of Irvine, California and heading toward the San Diego–Tijuana trans border, things were feeling safer, but Edward was getting more worried about his boyfriend.
The guard, Felix, had turned the favor into a brand new set of lives; forging new IDs and identities for them(for a price), and Edward had bought the old Chevy from Felix’s sister at a discounted rate.
In a series of seemingly endless blunders and mixups, Felix made it seem like the scheduling for three different prisoners were switched, and there was an oversight from his department head, which created the ‘error’.
Felix had mixed up the schedules so terribly, it took several days to figure out the issue. John H. Becker, who was on his way to a pre-scheduled psychiatrist meeting at court never made it.
Love was their escape.
About the Creator
Reader insights
Outstanding
Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!
Top insights
Excellent storytelling
Original narrative & well developed characters
Heartfelt and relatable
The story invoked strong personal emotions
Easy to read and follow
Well-structured & engaging content
Compelling and original writing
Creative use of language & vocab
On-point and relevant
Writing reflected the title & theme
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Eye opening
Niche topic & fresh perspectives
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Zero grammar & spelling mistakes
Comments (19)
Wait! I need to read it again...
Great distillation. I have had to read 5 times to get all the elements.... well plotted! ❤️
How can so few words tell such a complex twist. A true editor you are! Congrats on TS
Nice information
Awww, I always love reading about Edward and John! Congratulations on your Top Story!
Great read
I liked john
Congratulation! I liked John & Edward!
John and Edward take their love on the road! Great micro, Melissa and Congratulations on Top Story!
Congratulations!
John and Edward never disappoint! Suspense, adventure, and romance follow them everywhere. I suspect it's because Melissa is a very talented story crafter. :)
Sweet!!! Inside job, loved it!!! Congratulation on Top Story!!!💖💖💕
Great story. Congrats on the TS
So much said in so few words. Well done and congrats on the Top Story.
Congratulations, Melissa!
Congratulations on your Top Story Sis, great work
Yes, I Really Enjoyed Reading This and now you have me thinking about the story😉❗
AMAZING WORK O M G I LOVE IT!!!
So many events going on in such a micro story, this is going to make a great sequel 🥳🥰🎊