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Death by Chocolate

A Tale of Two Friends Against the World

By Hugh Maclean Published 3 years ago 7 min read
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Death by Chocolate
Photo by Ayesha Firdaus on Unsplash

Death by Chocolate

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“I wouldn’t be doing that if I were you…”

It’s not the first time that those words had been said by Peter to Maximillian over the period of their long friendship. And not for the first time, Peter had hoped that this occasion would not be the last.

It had all begun so many years before. Peter and Maximillian had met at school, and almost immediately struck up a friendship characterised by their unwavering loyalty to each other, at times bordering on complete and total devotion. Other friends and acquaintances would come and go, but Peter and Maximillian would never leave one another’s side. Two best mates against the world, and the world didn’t stand a chance.

Maximillian was a risk taker. Small, deft and agile, he was the one with the self-confidence and elan to get into any scrape that was going around. He was never one to stay quiet when he felt that something needed to be said; one always knew when Maximillian was in the room.

And whilst his behaviour would often be characterised by a whiff of near unacceptable danger, Maximillian always seemed to carry himself with an impish charm which endeared itself to friend and foe alike. He was a modern-day Jack Dawkins–one who could steal the food off your plate but do so in such a way that you usually ended up offering more.

Peter was the more naturally cautious of the pairing. Where his little mate would take whatever risk that he could find, Peter would calculate that risk, evaluate pros and cons, and determine whether the pair would be likely to land in the boiling pot or the cool oasis. Indeed, he often found himself being the handbrake to his friend’s accelerator pedal.

Whilst Maximillian was short in stature and nimble, Peter was the taller and thicker set of the pairing. His greater size added to the quiet authority that he possessed, and whilst he didn’t always deliberately set out to be so, Peter came to be regarded as a leader amongst his peers. For he provided the safe charter through whatever stormy seas were to be navigated, and he was wise, dogged and dependable enough to ensure that no harm would be done.

It is often stated that opposites attract, and attract these two did. In the years subsequent to their childhood meeting, there would be many adventures, and it seemed that there was no situation too dire for them to negotiate. However, this was different. It seemed so innocuous, but Peter genuinely feared that if his little friend rolled the dice this time, not even his vast reserves of wisdom and cunning could save the day.

It’s amazing how, in times of great stress, the mind wanders to times and places almost long forgotten but stored like paper at the back of the filing cabinet. Now, whilst in the greatest need of inspiration, Peter found himself recalling past trials and tribulations; sticky messes that he had managed to get the pair out of unscathed.

There was of course the night of that great argument in the car park of the Victoria Hotel. Who could forget that one, where six combatants, all so much bigger than Maximillian and Peter, decided that this was the time and place to settle scores from the past and the present. Of course, size made no difference to Maximillian. In his usual obdurate fashion, he decided that his opinion needed to be voiced. And voice it he did, the trill sounds coming from his mouth seeming so inconsequential against the booming tones of the other physically superior protagonists, but delivered with no less enthusiasm or conviction.

One particularly belligerent member of this warring mob decided that he didn’t care for Maximillian’s stance, nor his impudence in choosing to express it. He looked down upon his counterpart that was a mere midget in his presence, with the disdain that a heavyweight wrestler might have for a humble cruiserweight before declaring that he “doesn’t want any of this”. He could truly have ripped Maximillian apart, limb from limb, and discarded him like a rag doll that had long outlived its usefulness. Which he probably would have done had Peter not been there to lend the calm air of diplomacy and reason to the situation that allowed them to escape without the need for unnecessary and unwanted bloodshed.

Peter also recalled the infamous Riverbank Incident a year and a half previous, and was moved to shake his head in wonderment at how they survived. The two of them were walking along on a warm, sunny spring afternoon when Maximillian spied a picnic on the other side of the river that he rather fancied being a part of. Maximillian could never resist a good feed, and he soon decided that he was charismatic enough to be invited to join the festivities should he find himself in the immediate vicinity. And besides, the river wasn’t particularly wide in that section, so…

Peter was never the strongest of swimmers, and Maximillian was even less so, but that didn’t bother Maximillian unduly. He was never one to let such trivialities get in the way of having a good time. And so, before Peter could even warn against such folly, Maximillian had left the safety of the bank and had entered the cool waters of the river, bound for the other side. Maximillian had barely got to the half-way mark of his journey when the futility of his actions became so blindingly obvious. Rather than swimming, he was sinking. And fast…

With scant regard for his own safety, Peter took up the challenge. He had to get to Maximillian and rectify the situation no matter how greatly the odds were stacked against him. If he could somehow get to his friend and shepherd him towards an overhanging tree branch fifty metres away, then the day could be saved. Peter knew that it was a long shot, but he had to try. He paddled and paddled with all his might, and before he knew it, he had reached Maximillian, now flagging noticeably and struggling to breathe. The smaller swimmer now had a larger, stronger companion to cling onto, however. To this day, Peter knew not quite how he managed to do it, but he dragged himself and his friend to that branch through sheer will, and on to safety from there.

It is, of course, fair to say that Maximillian’s problems weren’t always of his own making. There was the occasion where he and Peter were with friends on a hiking trip, and some bright spark decided at the end of the day to commence the drive home with them not in the car. For what seemed an eternity they looked through the bushland for their hiking partners, but to no avail. Finally they decided that the only way they would make it home was to get there themselves. Fifteen kilometres in the cold and dark of a late winters’ night, but they somehow managed to make it back safely. Maximillian’s tenacity coupled with Peter’s knowledge and common sense had kept them free from harm once more.

All of this, however; all this history and the experiences that the two great friends had shared, it seemed so insignificant when faced with the threat that loomed before them on this day.

The day had dawned brightly and was just warm enough for the outdoors to beckon. The nearby national park would be Peter and Maximillian’s playground, its scent and colour the perfect backdrop for the day’s looming adventures. As they strode onward through the trees towards the peaceful lake, they spied a family enjoying a sumptuous lunch. A gigantic slab of chocolate cake was plated on the picnic blanket.

Immediately Peter sensed danger. “No, Maximillian!”, he exclaimed to his lifelong friend. “Don’t do it!!!”

“You know how toxic chocolate is to dogs. Especially small dogs like us!!!”

Alas, it was too late. Before Peter could even finish uttering his warning, Maximillian had devoured the chocolate cake as if swallowing it whole, consuming every last crumb seemingly without even pausing for breath.

There was nothing that he could do to save his friend now. He could but watch, and wait. And hope…

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