An Inconspicuous Day

He lifted his hand to his forehead and felt his fingertips hit moisture. Paul couldn’t remember the last time he had felt so excited and nervous at the same time. He avoided her gaze and hadn’t said much. Paul wondered if that might have upset her.

His heart on the verge of bursting out of his chest, he looked into the kitchen.

“Glass of wine sounds nice. I’ve got one of my favourite bottles saved.”

He stood up and walked briskly to his wine cabinet. He knew a bit of wine would ease his nerves. He placed his hands on the cabinet handle and looked back at Maria. She looked like an angel. He studied himself in the nearby window, coming to the conclusion that he looked like a pile of festering garbage in comparison. He tousled his hair gently to try and hide his receding hairline.

His kitchen was a mess, and he was grateful she hadn’t said anything about it. He had just finished cooking up them both some sirloin steaks - medium rare because how could you eat it any other temperature – and had made a side of mashed potatoes and garlic roasted asparagus to go with it. He hadn’t worked hard to make a meal so perfect in quite a while. He was proud of the result and was hoping it was enough to win over Maria; She seemed to be pleased so far.

Paul reached into the cabinet and pulled out a bottle of merlot. Couldn’t have a nice juicy steak without a glass of red to pair with it. He twisted off the cap and poured two glasses out. He brought it over to the table and placed one glass in front of Maria.

“Here you are. It’s a merlot.” Paul sat across from her and placed his nose into the glass, breathing in the wine’s sharp, musky scent. He took a swig and sloshed it around his mouth, the tartness punching his cheeks.

“What do you think?” he asked.

She was still smiling at him.

“I knew you’d like it. I can tell you’re a woman of good taste.” She had only been in his house for a few hours, but he knew there was something special about her. It was more than the glimmer from her deep green eyes. She was patient. He knew she cared about him without her even saying it.

He placed his glass back down and noticed some sweat marks from where his hand had been. Why did she make him so nervous? Maybe it was because he knew she was thinking things without saying them. Was it too cold in here for her? Did she not like the wine?

Paul shook his head. He needed to stop being so paranoid. She would tell him if something was wrong. He knows she’s that type of woman. A woman who says what she wants when she wants it; it was dead sexy.

“You know, I built most of the furniture in here by myself. My own two hands. I had always thought about being a carpenter, but there something to be said about hobbies that remain hobbies. Sometimes when you do something you love for work, you start to lose that love.”

Maria nodded intently. She told Paul of a time when she tried to be a singer, but she realized she didn’t enjoy the politics of singing, and rather enjoyed entertaining her friends. She asked Paul what he did for work.

“Oh, I’m an accountant. Nothing exhilarating, but it’s honest work, and I’m proud of that. How about you?”

Maria told Paul she was in between jobs.

“It’s okay, you don’t need a job here. My other girl, Stacey, she’s good company. I’m sure you two will be good friends.”

Maria looked down at her lap and Paul’s chest tightened.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean- she’s just- look, I was thinking you guys would be friends? Was that wrong of me to assume? Maybe you should just meet her. She’s in my-“

“Dad? Hello?!” The sound of the front door slammed shut and Paul dropped his fork. He had completely forgot that Josie was coming over today.

Her footsteps climbed the stairs and Paul accepted defeat; it was too late to hide Maria.

“What happened in here? Dad?” Josie walked through the kitchen and into the dining room. She stopped at the doorway when she saw Maria. Her eyes flicked to Paul, eyebrows raised. “Seriously.”

Paul’s heart dropped. “I-I’m sorry. I didn’t forget, I swear!” He jumped out of his seat and ran into the kitchen.

Josie kept her eyes fixated on Maria. “So, where’d you find this one?”

Paul stepped back into the dining room holding a chocolate cake with five candles in it. He placed it on the table. “Same as Stacey.”

Josie rolled her eyes. She picked up Maria’s wine glass and took a swig.

“Excuse me!” Paul shouted. “That’s not yours!”

“I’m sorry, I just couldn’t help but notice she hadn’t taken a sip!” Josie finished the rest of the glass. “I need this if you expect me to keep hanging around these things. Especially if I have to share my birthday with a doll. Imagine that, turning twenty-three and your dad cooks a romantic dinner for his date with a freaking doll instead.”

The sarcasm in Josie’s voice annoyed Paul. She was always like that when Stacey was around. “Josie, please.”

“No! You forgot it was my birthday!”

“I did not!”

“Yes, you did.” Josie looked at the cake. “Okay, maybe you knew, but as soon as this doll showed up, you forgot!”

Paul was disheartened. It was always the same conversation with Josie, and he was tired of explaining himself. He wished she could just understand.

Maria looked abashed and Paul; realized how rude he was being to her.

“Josie, this is Maria. Maria, this is Josie, my daughter.”

Maria extended her hand. Josie stared at her.

“She wants to shake your hand,” Paul said. Josie rolled her eyes and shook Maria’s hand.

“She said you look nice,” Paul told Josie.

“Weird, I didn’t hear a thing. Oh, that’s right, maybe because it’s A DOLL? Jesus Christ, wasn’t one enough? Do you like being the laughingstock of all my friends?”

“You tell your friends?”

“Of course! How else am I supposed to make sense of this… whatever it is!”

Paul felt his heart sink and he closed his eyes. He felt tears tug at the corner of his eyelids. “I wish you wanted to see me happy.”

“I do!”

“They make me happy. I don’t know how I can make you understand, but they are important to me. Isn’t that all that matters?”

Josie didn’t reply for a while. She walked over to Maria and ran her fingers along her face. “She’s… pretty.”

Paul opened his eyes. “Yeah, she is.”

Josie sighed. “I’m sorry. I do want you to be happy, I know it’s selfish for me to bother you about them, but it’s so… weird.”

“I’m aware it’s abnormal. Why do you think I don’t invite anyone over?”

Josie shrugged. “I just assumed you didn’t have any friends.”

Paul didn’t have any friends. Everyone knew how strange he was, despite his best efforts to be perceived as normal. He was bad at talking to people. He never knew what to say.

“Maria, Stacey, they listen to me when I speak. No one else listens to me. No one wants to hear what I have to say. Your mother never did either. But Stacey, she can’t wait to hear about my day at work, no matter how boring it might be. She begs me to tell her more, even the mundane stuff. And she laughs at my jokes. Every one of them. C’mon, you know how bad my jokes are.”

Josie was busy stroking Maria’s hair. “Maybe I’ve been unfair to you.”

Paul was shocked to hear her give up fighting him so easily. She’s always had a strong distaste for Stacey. He was really worried a second doll would be the last straw for her. He wasn’t planning on even showing her Maria until – well he didn’t know when. He was hoping she’d never find out.

Paul didn’t know what to say. He stared at Josie’s fingers, twirling through Maria’s hair.

Josie looked at him. “Maybe I should just… stop bothering you about them so much, I just - I really hate it sometimes. Like, I feel like when they’re around, you don’t see me.”

“What do you mean?”

“I just don’t get the same amount of attention. So, forgive me if I resent the dolls. But like, I’m a living breathing person next to you and most of the time you would rather focus your time on an inanimate object. It makes me feel a bit invisible. It’s like you love these dolls more than your own daughter.”

It cut Paul deep to hear his daughter say that. He couldn’t believe he had been making Josie feel the same way he felt before he had gotten Maria or Stacey.

“Look,” Josie said pointing to the cake. “I’m guessing Maria arrived today, and you were so excited you didn’t plan anything for the two of us.”

Paul gave a sheepish nod. There was no denying the truth now. His daughter was too smart for her own good. He did have plans for him and Josie on her special day, but of course those plans had remained only plans as soon as he took Maria out of the box. He felt so terrible he didn’t think he could even sing ‘happy birthday’ at this point. He began pulling the candles out of the cake.

Josie helped him. “I’m willing to work on this relationship,” She said, pointing to Maria. “If you’re willing to work on ours.”

Paul brought his daughter into a hug. “Of course, kiddo. I really do love you. I’m so sorry if I don’t make that apparent enough to you.”

“I know.”

Paul cut a piece of chocolate cake off and handed to the plate to Josie.

“Here, Maria, you can have the first piece.” She placed the plate in front of Maria and saw her dad smile. Josie licked her lips. She wasn’t sure if she would ever get used to talking to them like they were real, but she was willing to do it if it made her dad happy.

Josie cut off her own piece and took a bite. Her eyes rolled back. “Mmmm. If you didn’t make the best chocolate cake in the whole damn world, I’d be SO much angrier at you right now.”

Paul took a bite of his own slice and felt his chest rise with pride. He shifted his eyes from Josie to Maria. She was enjoying the cake as well. She gave Paul a wink and Paul relaxed in his chair. “Happy Birthday, kiddo.”