Age Appropriate

“Hey honey, what’s your name?”

Troy looked the odd older lady over before answering her. He tried his best not to laugh out loud as she shimmied and shook off beat to the music. He couldn’t help but wonder what she was doing there and who she was with.

“My name is Troy… ma’am.”

Miriam rubbed up close to the young man, resting her hand on top of his, stroking gently back and forth. She seemed to purr as she spoke.

“Ma’am is what you call your mama Troy and I’m not her but I could be if you want me to.”

Troy remained respectful to the elder woman as he slowly slid his hand from under hers and off the bar.

“I’m sorry. What is your name?”

“Miriam.”

“It’s very good to meet you Miriam.”

“Well it’s very good to meet you too mister. So, you here waiting on somebody or you just hanging out today?”

“I guess I’m just hanging out.”

“Well again, it is good to meet you.”

Miriam attempted to raise her soft wrinkling hand to his lips. Troy easily lowered her hand and shook it. Miriam flirted with and touched Troy when she could. Seductively she spoke to him in an attempt to arouse him.

The sports bar was a little thin on that slow Tuesday in March. So bar fly Troy didn’t mind the attention of the older woman without many eyes to witness it. The drinks were flowing and Miriam was buying. She smiled seductively behind her glasses, freckles popping off of her smooth light brown skin. She did look young for her age but she could easily be Troy’s mother’s older sister. Happy hour was almost over and Miriam was trying to get her young buck back to the stable. Troy an underachieving twenty something sleeping on his aunt’s couch had nothing better to do than to go home with a new sugar mama. Miriam paid the tab and led Troy out of the bar.

“You just come on with me baby. I’ll bring you back to get your car.”

Troy happily got into the passenger seat of Miriam’s sporty coupe. Little did she know Troy had no car to come back to. He often got dropped off at the local watering hole by his aunt on her way to her second job. Troy knew everyone in town, being born and raised there so he would just ask someone from his neighborhood to give him a ride home when the bar closed. Right hand on thigh riding up higher and higher while with the left Miriam drove with a wide smile on her face. The cougar had captured her prey; now she just needed to get him back to her cave. Troy was willing prey, she had him in her grip, his lap was heating up as Miriam continued to rub.

Soon they arrived at her home. She pulled into the garage and killed the engine. Miriam leaned over and gave the drunken young boy a full kiss on the lips before exiting the vehicle. The garage door closed behind them as they entered the home. Miriam led her young soon to be lover to the kitchen.

“You want another drink baby?”

“Sure.”

Two strong tall drinks of cognac and cola were iced and poured then she took his hand and led him down the hallway to her bedroom. Just as they walked pass one of the guess bedrooms, a door popped open and a woman called out.

“Mom, do you think I could borrow your… Oh, I didn’t know you had company.”

“Yes, I do.”

Miriam tried to push pass her daughter and get Troy to her bed. Troy tried to keep his head down, ashamed of being snared by the older woman. Unfortunately for him, the young woman recognized him.

“Troy?!?!?”

He looked up and back.

“Sharon?”

Sharon covered her mouth with her hands. She couldn’t believe what she was seeing.

One of her high school sweethearts was hooking up with her recently divorced mother.

Miriam was miffed at her daughter for disturbing her groove.

“Y’all know each other?”

Although appalled, Sharon answered quickly, nonchalantly.

“Oh yea, we went to high school together.”

“Well that’s nice, come on Troy.”

She dragged him into her bedroom then shut and locked the door. Miriam wanted to be sure there were no more interruptions. Troy couldn’t get Sharon out of his head at first but eventually he gave in to the liquor and Miriam’s warm, moist mouth. As the moaning started Sharon exited the home.

Sharon made her way to her best girlfriend’s house. She really didn’t want anyone to know about her cougar mother’s behavior but she knew she had to speak with someone. April was amazed at what she heard.

“What girl, get the hell outta here!”

“I wish I was playing girl but I’m serious.”

“Why didn’t you break it up. Wouldn’t no boom boom be going on wit my mama. No!”

“Look April, she’s grown. I can’t tell her what to do.”

“But what did she say when you told her you used to go with him.”

Sharon paused for a moment. The suspense was killing April.

“What girl?”

“I didn’t tell her we dated. I just told her we went to school together and then she dragged him in her room.”

April took a moment to choose her words carefully.

“I don’t understand; you used to like that boy. How could you just let it happen?”

Sharon exhaled heavily. She had already come to grips with her mother’s behavior and her true feelings for Troy.

“That love was puppy love, which is no love. I dumped him before I went away to college because he had no direction or goals. He just wanted to hang around with his friends being a knucklehead. People have told me all about Troy. While we were away at college getting degrees, he was here being a bum bouncing from couch to couch. I don’t have any feelings for him and as for my mother; that’s a different story. Since my parents got divorced and she moved into this new house she has just lost it. She has been running around with young boys, hanging out in places that she shouldn’t be. I think she is going through a mid-life crisis or something. I am going to tell her about the relationship I had with that boy when I was a girl. I let it happen because right now they deserve each other. I love my mother, I always will but I can’t wait till my condo is ready on Tuesday. I’ve got to get away from her crazy.”

April scooted over and gave her dear friend a hug. She understood that Sharon really needed someone to listen to her vent more than give her advice. April decided that they would make a girls night of it, she didn’t want her friend to go back into that house where her former boyfriend was sleeping with her mother. The two young ladies enjoyed a late dinner out followed by a few cocktails. They ended the night watching a movie on cable which they both fell asleep to.

There they were, just like high school, asleep in the living room with popcorn, blankets and pillows strewn about the room. That night Sharon enjoyed the best sleep she had in years. The next morning they would share a light brunch after hitting the gym. The night and day were very therapeutic for her, It was just what she needed after a semi-traumatic experience.

The scene wasn’t quite as heartwarming or special at Miriam’s house. There was a hung over young man staring at himself in the mirror of her master bathroom. Troy washed his face over and over again yet still, the shame would not leave him. He had thoughts of sneaking out but before he could get up the nerve Miriam called for him.

“Troy, baby are you okay in there?”

“Yes, I’ll be out in a minute.”

“Alright sweetie, you want some breakfast?”

“Sure, thank you.”

“Alright, I’ll see you at the breakfast table.”

“Okay, I’ll be right there.”

“Oh and there is a robe, towel and washcloth on the sink for you if you want to take a shower.”

“Thanks.”

Finally she made her way down the hallway towards the kitchen. Troy ran his hands through his dreads then wondered how he could get out of this mess. He showered, long and hard still no thoughts came to mind. Eventually he was resigned to the reality that he would be joining Mrs. Robinson for breakfast and quite possibly lunch. After showering he dried off and put on the robe she laid out for him.

As he approached the kitchen he could hear Miriam on the phone apparently talking to one of her friends who was also a notorious predatory cougar.

“Yea girl, I bagged me a young tenderoni last night. Uh um, this young buck can go too. I think he went to school with Sharon or something but hell everybody grown now.”

Troy didn’t want to walk in on her talking like that so he made some noise to make his presence known.

“Oh, here he comes now girl. What, do what you wouldn’t do. Oh don’t you worry, I already did. Bye Girl.”

Troy took his seat and his new mama fixed a plate for him. She gazed across the table at him. Miriam had been up for two hours. She had already shaved, showered and made her face up again. In addition to that she took many pictures with and of her new boo. She even went as far as to pose him with shades on. The lost woman felt no shame. Troy looked back at the woman. She was fifty-seven, could pass for forty-seven but liked her men under twenty-seven.

“So, what you got planned today Mr. man? I thought maybe we could go to Hots for lunch and then hit the mall for a movie. While I’m there I think I’ll pick up some new shoes for the gym. Will you join me today?”

Miriam reached across the table and rubbed Troy’s hand just as she had when they met the night before. Again Mama was footing the bill and he had nothing better to do.

“I’ve never been to Hots before I heard they got some good food. I was going to get into a something today but you know I could do that tomorrow.”

Miriam rose elegantly from her seat and walked over to where Troy was seated. She wiped bacon grease from his lips then pushed the table forward and sat on his lap. She wiggled and bounced a little until she felt his nature rise.

“We’re gonna have us a good time today.”

She gave him a seductive full kiss on the lips then rubbed his lips with her forefinger removing the lip stick she left on his mouth. It would seem that Troy was being taken in by Miriam’s mature charms. He kissed her back then placed his hand inside of her night gown.

As their groping and pawing became more intense Sharon entered the kitchen.

“Ill! I thought you would be gone by now Troy. Mom look at yourself; what are you doing?”

Miriam got off of her young lover’s lap, closed her night gown and tried to straighten herself up a bit. She took a seat as her daughter continued to scold them.

“Mom I think it is time you started dating men more age appropriate instead of twenty-five year-old losers. As for you Troy, you are just nasty. You are even more sorry than they said you were. I’m glad I dumped you when I did.”

Miriam was surprised by what she was hearing.

“What do you mean? He used to be your boyfriend?”

Sharon rolled her eyes.

“Yes Mom, we used to date back in high school but you never met him. You know that Daddy wouldn’t let me date no bum so I didn’t bring him around. I liked him but I knew from what Daddy taught me that he was less than what I deserved in a man. He had no plan or ambition so I couldn’t let him drag me down. I went away to college, got my degree and found a career for myself just to come back home to see my mother making the mistakes I refused to make as a girl in high school.”

Miriam looked down at her kitchen linoleum flooring, suddenly ashamed for her actions. It would seem that her daughter was now wiser than she.

“I don’t know what you are going through Mom but you need to get yourself together because this is embarrassing. As for you Troy, go get a job and stop prostituting yourself for liquor and lodging. You’re pitiful. Mom, don’t worry, I’ll be out of here Tuesday and you can screw all the young bums and my former boyfriends that you want! This is ridiculous. You should both be ashamed of yourselves.”

Sharon stormed down the hall to the guest bedroom leaving Miriam and Troy in a strange silence in the kitchen. Neither of them could bring themselves to look the other in the eye. Miriam had never felt so much shame in her life. Being lectured by her only child really opened her eyes; she could now see how foolish and cheap she had been.

Troy thought to himself about the fact that the girl he loved in high school didn’t even think enough of him to let him meet her parents. She dumped him because she predicted him to be a failure in life and here he was, failing. He thought about the two children he had fathered but never supported and the string of fat chicks and old cougars he had slept with just to get a free meal, drink or drugs. He had no permanent address or vehicle and nothing going for himself. All Troy owned was a bunch of burned bridges left in the wake of his lazy foolish life. He had no where in particular to go but he knew that he had to get out of there. Both Miriam and Troy were disgusted with themselves. The thrill was gone and there was no more passion between the two.

When the ignominy in their eyes finally met, they couldn’t wait to part company. They both now found one another and themselves revolting. Miriam spoke up first.

“Maybe we could go to Hots another time. I think I need to go in here and talk to Sharon. Why didn’t you tell me… never mind. Finish your breakfast and I’ll call you a cab.”

Troy nodded then looked back down at his plate. He didn’t finish his breakfast, instead he got up and got dressed. As he put his clothes on he could hear things heating up in Sharon’s bedroom. Troy wanted no part of that so he waited out on the porch of the house. He busied himself thinking of how he was going to pay for the cab. Once he was outside he could hear the women continue their conversation through the window.

“Mom what is wrong with you? Why are you acting like this? I don’t understand. You have always been a respectable, honorable woman, wife and mother. I looked up to you, I modeled myself after you. It was you I tried to emulate.

You were the woman I wanted to be. I know the divorce with Daddy was tough but why did you have to change so much Mama?”

Miriam remained silent for a moment as she contemplated her actions and recent history. The woman knew that it was time to bare her soul and share all of her pain with her now adult daughter. She decided to speak to this wise young woman as if she were a friend and not her child.

“You don’t know how tough it really was. You were gone away to college and your father just fell out of love with me. We didn’t fight a lot; he just didn’t want to do it anymore. I mean that literally and figuratively. It hurt, it cut me deep. I felt like less than a woman.”

With tears in her eyes she continued on.

“You know your father is a good man. I don’t think he cheated on me or lied about anything he just wanted to be on his own… without me. He couldn’t explain it to me clearly but deep down inside I knew what he was saying was true.”

Her tears increased as she continued on.

“I cried, he felt guilty so in the divorce he gave me whatever I wanted. I know you wanted us to keep your childhood home but I wanted a new start. That was the start of it, the selfishness. I wanted to erase all of the memories of what I saw as a failed marriage to protect my own feelings no matter how it made anyone else feel. I was the victim. I was being discarded and possibly replaced.”

She paused then continued on.

“My girlfriend Gladys took me out to get a make over and buy some new clothes. Then she took me to happy hour to introduce me to some of her male friends.”

“Miss Gladys?”

“Yes Miss Gladys girl.”

They shared a slight tearful chuckle.

“I enjoyed the attention. It made me feel pretty again but those men were just a little too old for me. You have to understand, I had only one boyfriend before I met your father.”

Her daughter gave her a loo of surprise.

“I had only been with two men for over fifty years. I thought my love life was over and then I realized that men still found me desirable. Now when I last dated, I dated young men and that is what I was still attracted to. But I would never have intentionally hurt you. I am so sorry Baby. I need to do better, be far less indiscriminate. I been acting like a ho! And it took my baby to open my eyes to my own mess. I promise I will never embarrass you like this again and I will be the mother you need me to be again. I just thank you for loving and forgiving me.”

The women shared a tearful loving embrace. Just then the women were interrupted by the chime of the door bell. Miriam and Sharron walked arm in arm to the front door to see who it was. They opened to see Troy with the cab parked behind him. He had a pitiful look on his face.

“I’m sorry to interrupt y’all but I don’t have cash on me to pay for the cab. Do you think you could help me out?”

Sharon looked over at her mother and Miriam just shook her head then put her face in her palms. Sharon was so over this boy. She marched into the living room, grabbed her purse and came storming back. Pulled a twenty from it and gave it to Troy.

“Here boy. Now take your sorry behind on somewhere.”

As he turned with his tale between his legs and started to walk away Sharon yelled out to him. Her words cut him deep as they rang and echoed around the cuddle sac.

“Stop trying to pick up lonely old ladies at bars to be your sugar mamas and take care of them damn babies you got. You buster!”

She turned to apologize to her mother. They shared a smile then a chuckle and eventually a sideby side hug as they watched the cab drive the buster away.

“Sorry about the lonely old lady crack mom.”

Her mother smiled at her.

“No, baby I’m fine. I am an older lady. A power beautiful and once again respectful older lady but I will never be lonely Baby. I am going to embrace my life’s experience and wisdom gained. I need to start acting more… age appropriate anyway.”