2 Seconds to Heartbrake

“You are the worst thing that happened to me, I wish I had never met you”, those were the words she uttered in complete anger with the worst expression I had ever seen on her face. The emotions were running high like nothing I had ever seen before and it was clear to see the hurt through all the screams, she wasn’t holding back on me, she didn’t care about hurting me at that point, at least not emotionally and so she used everything at her disposal to make me feel pain, just short of stabbing me or throwing a vase in my face. It was surreal for me, I had never seen her so angry, I had never seen her so emotional and yet, here she was, the woman I had married and decided to spend the rest of my life with, where was all of this violence coming from, had it always been in her or was all of it just new, did I suddenly change from the sweet loving man she had fallen in love with or was she always like this and I just hadn’t seen it all this while? So many questions rushing in my mind as I watched her go after me with all sorts of insults and screams.

I tried to stop her but she won’t listen to anything I said, no justification was going to cut it and since my voice was definitely at a lower pitch than what she was blessed with from nature, shouting over her was just impossible. In a brief instant, this was no longer the cute and charming woman I had married but looked more like a total stranger to me, I had never seen this side of her in all our years of marriage, so much violence, aggression, resentment and pain, you could tell she had been holding on to so much for all these years. Things she never said, liked or appreciated and now that the opportunity came, she wasn’t holding them back anymore, she let it all out in an instant on me, like a storm, I was overwhelmed.

It all started with love

Take me back to that day when I met you, that moment when my heart skipped of joy and I couldn’t explain the feeling, when I thought I was going crazy just thinking about you and all what we could be. Take me back to that first conversation, that first kiss and the first time I told you I loved you. Take me back to that moment when you cared and when you cried tears of happiness. When I was all you needed and all you’ll ever want out of this life which took everything else from us. Take me back to the moment when we were both grateful and self-sufficient with just being together against the impossible, that moment when my voice was your favorite lullaby and your tears were my greatest motivation in the world. Take me back to those cold nights when my arms turned to blankets and we traded heat in the cold of the night and the starry skies. Take me back to those days.

How did we get here?

When did things turn left? When did I become the villain who hurts you all the time. We had good moments, unforgettable ones which we immortalized through the pictures you see on the wall, the times we laughed but also the times we cried together. You were always my beacon, that person I looked to whenever I felt insecure, that person I knew I could count on when this life went crazy. I would have gone to the ends of the earth for our love to last forever, after all the sacrifices and the pain we went through together, how come we came out in two pieces. We weren’t strong enough to face this world together so now we are falling apart from what I can only blame on fate, the scars are obvious, the reckoning is evident. I know you are hurting but I’m not the cause of your pain, I never changed but the circumstances of our lives did, I’m the same person you loved, can you even hear me? I can’t see them but I feel the tears.

Just a Dream

I’m losing my mind feeling powerless and knowing there is nothing I can do to take this pain away, the money couldn’t do a thing, my words didn’t make a difference and my intentions were all too powerless too. I feel like I’m falling down from a sky crapper and before I hit the floor, I wake up. It was just all a dream I was in, I’m not married and I don’t even know who this woman is, yet I could feel all those emotions so vividly.

PS: This is a fictional story, none of the characters or story in this article is real. This is just the fruit of my imagination and hours listening to sad love songs 😆

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