Most recently published stories in Families.
The Difference Between My Therapists and My Father
First therapist. First session. I’m nervous. I sit in the waiting room across from my mother. She’s always been supportive and understanding. I’m glad she’s doing this for me, but part of me wishes I hadn’t asked for this. What do I have to be sad about?
Adventures in Motherhood (Part 2)
Well, I had planned on writing once a week more or less but it's only been three days and I'm ready to write again! Okay, parents, let's talk crying babies... I know, I know, it isn't a very uncommon thing for a baby to cry but what about a baby who, up until about a week ago, has been a fairly happy baby and is now up multiple times in a night and crying all day? This is what is happening to me and I think it is because of a number of factors.
For years, Thanksgiving has been an afterthought in my family. Seemed like we always went from fun in September and October of Halloween directly into the festivities of Christmas in November and December. Aside from the Football games on Thanksgiving and the shopping afterwards, there wasn't much love for turkey day. We would go to an aunt's or uncle's house or my mom's cousin's house for the meal. No real traditions. No real celebrations. Just another day to get together with the family. My mom wasn’t big on cooking a Thanksgiving feast. I remember probably 2 or 3 times she hosted dinner for the day. The holiday never really had any significance for us. Just eat and watch football. Just like anything else in life, the day holiday took on a more significant meaning after the lose of my mom, which in turn helped to build my relationships with my family.
My Little Blessings
I don't know what it is about children or babies (whichever word helps you imagine a cute little being) that has us adults considering creating these little creatures. Don't get me wrong; I love babies! I mean I should, considering the fact that I have three of them! (Wide eyed emoji). But what is it about them that has us under this spell to keep populating the earth with them? If you really think about it, children are the death of us. Point blank period! We make them, only to be subjected to their every demanding need, 24 hours of the day. I mean that's a job in its self. One that should be paying top dollar! I'm talking about presidential lifestyle. YESSS HONEY!!! I should be living like a queen. Bigger than Queen Elizabeth because I got babies! Yeah that's right. I should be richer than Richie Rich. Why? Because I got babies. Now you see, having these babies is not cheap and man do they take my sanity and turn it into insanity by the end of the day. I'm talking about not being able to shower until 1 PM, because when I'm forcefully woken up at 7 AM in the morning by the two energetic toodlers, I gots to get up and GO GO GO GO. Honey, I'm talking about not being able to brush my teeth because these kids got me running around in the kitchen like I'm on the red team of Hell's Kitchen preparing a meal to just get thrown back in my face because, "it's too cold", "it's not enough" or because they don't want it anymore. And Lord forgive me for wanting my children to just sit down and SHUT UP when 2:00 PM rolls around, because you know that's when momma gotta watch her Maury and Steve Wilkos show. That is if the baby doesn't demand my attention during this time. I mean, like it's not bad enough that right now at this very moment as I am typing, I cannot correct every spelling mistake I have or polish my grammar because these kids are driving me nuts at this very second as I'm trying to put them to sleep. You know what, I am feeling very compelled to start praying right now; here goes...... Lord, I love you. Lord, I thank you for each and every day that I wake up and am able to walk and talk, and just enjoy life. But Lord, I just have one question to ask you...... why in the world didn't you stop the clock when you saw that I was engaging in non-marital relations when my momma told me no? Lord, these children have taken me from 0 to 100 real quick and have caused physical damage to me. Lord, they have taken my once before sexy petite body and turned it, into a size 14 stretch mark, back fat, granny panty, fat armed walking machine. Lord, I used to take pride in how I looked and now my husband's lucky if I even draw on my eyebrows in the morning. Lord, I have learned my lesson. SEX is BAD!!! And I promise to spread the word of the consequences of having children to all the teenagers who are out of their horny adolescent minds. Forgive me for my sins Lord, amen. You know what? I actually feel a lot better now. I love my kids y'all, but I would be lying if I said I wish I had waited a bit longer to have them. I wish I really sat back and thought about the alter life change I would have by not taking the proper precautions when having intercourse. I wish I had really LISTENED to my mother when she told me "your whole life will change, you will change." But here I am and here I stand. A 25-years-old who has three beautiful healthy children, but who had to postpone certain things because she was having kids, when she should have postponed having kids to focus on the important things. Like the old saying goes; "you live and you learn," and boy have I learned. Nevertheless, I am grateful for them, because they have given me a completely new purpose in life and drive that I have never had before I had them. So to all the childless readers out there; really evaluate your life before contemplating about having children, because having children is easy; it's raising them and being able to care for them physically, emotionally, and mentally that's the hard part.
I Hated Being Pregnant
Gather round, strangers on the internet, for I am about to tell you something that I got absolutely crucified for saying (without fail) every single time I dared utter it aloud.
Best Diapers for Newborns
If you want to make your baby comfortable and avoid fits of unnecessary crying, you'd be wise to make sure their butts are taken care of. The easiest way to do this is with a reliably great diaper. What should you buy? Are they all the same? No, they aren't all the same, and I've compiled the best diapers for newborns into an easily digestible list.
My Struggle with Teen Pregnancy
Finding Out I found out I was pregnant. It was at the doctor's office and I didn't even physically see that I was pregnant, I was only told. I was supposed to be getting a new form of birth control, which would have been the implant, and I was not looking forward to it. My grandmother was devastated upon finding out because I was only six days away from turning seventeen and I had been in my senior year, so I was thinking about colleges and work. She called my grandfather and he didn't even want to talk to me. I had to tell my stepdad at the house, whom I was living with due to the recent passing of my mother. His reaction was one I never wanted to hear. He was the one to argue and belittle everyone but himself. Claiming it didn't happen on his watch, my boyfriend didn't even have a job, I was going places, etc. Everyone besides my stepdad and my boyfriend's mother had pushed abortion every day until I made up my mind.
Wait.. I'm a Trans Man, but I'm Pregnant???
So to start off, a little bit of basic background. I've been out as a trans male for almost 5 years now, and have been taking steps since then towards transitioning. Most of my friends who knew me beforehand and still were around after I came out have commented on the fact I seem a lot more confident and happy since I have begun my transition. To some it made a lot of sense. To others, I had to explain a little about it because my story wasn't what most people would consider typical. I figured out in my 20's that I was transgender because the house I was raised in was pretty much a box where such terms like gay, and bi and lesbian and transgender didn't exist. I didn't even know what they were. So, it was the first time I had ever heard the term, or met someone else who was. But after that discovery, over the next couple of years, I began to finally grow into myself, learning more and more about who I actually was. It wasn't always an easy thing. There were moments when I would break down in a panic/anxiety attack on the sidewalk when walking to the store because dysphoria would hit me out of nowhere at the thought of the store clerk referring to me as female, or the random depression spikes I commonly dealt with. But over time, I slowly got more and more stable, especially after getting on testosterone. That helped a lot, in many ways. It was validating because a lot of the issues I had beforehand, even seemingly unrelated ones, seemed to become less of an issue. Such as the fact of me being super clumsy before, and after being on testosterone, that seemed to go away.
Messed Up Parents, Raise Messed Up Kids
I had this epiphany lying in bed the other morning and it was this… The clock read 6:00 A.M and although I preferred to sleep in I still felt rested. I lay there staring at the ceiling, trying to figure out why I had this deep-rooted bitterness towards my mom. My entire life I remained fixated on the fact that my father was an addict and he continually let me down with his relapses. Always pointing out his flaws, begging him to get better, and living my life day by day wishing he would change. I had been consumed and obsessed with my dad and how his life would turn out, so much that I never noticed the narcissistic mother I had. Somewhere inside I feel as if she knew that the whole time, thrived off it. Ever since my father passed away a year ago, my relationship with her has never been the same, she can’t hide anymore and I’m starting to notice the wolf that she really is.
I Wish It Were a Dream
Imagine one day waking up and having a loved one’s memory of you erased in the blink of an eye. It was a bright and sunny Friday morning in the month of May. She was just a small town ordinary freshman girl getting ready for a casual day of school. When suddenly she heard the most horrific, indescribable sound she had ever heard. In shock, she waited patiently hoping; praying for it to be just her mother yelling at her older brother for his TV being too loud.
Off the Back
1 I see you questioning yourself. You grow frustrated and tired and frustrated again. You haven’t even saddled up yet and you’re already thinking of dropping out. I watch you get into your placement. One eighty-six is printed in bold black lettering on the white tag pinned to your maroon and navy Mettle jersey. You have an intense focus, eyes ahead, helmet tightened, your left foot clipped into the pedal. I see you shift your body. You look defeated before you’ve even begun. You resolve to quit the race. Why do you look around and compare yourself? I think, at least you showed up.
How I Lost My Boy When He Was Just 15
"All is for the best in the best of all possible worlds," Said Gottfried Leibniz in 1710. An optimist might believe this is indeed the case... an optimist who also believes in the Supreme Being. God couldn't make a wrong decision, so despite the multitude of different choices we could make, the ones we make under his guidance are always the right ones. So probably someone with a strong faith and happy in their simplistic view of the world we live in.