Broken Branches

Once upon a time, there was a family. A mother, a father, a daughter, and two sons. They grew up in poverty, they were not well off. They lived in a big city but had very little to their name. Father was abusive, a very cruel man. He mistreated them but most of all their mother. He didn't stay in their lives to long, but in what time he was there he provided plenty of trauma. And mother, she was always there. She worked so very hard to provide for her kids and raise them right. They moved around a lot but she did everything she could for them with what she had. Though she regretted the life she had to give them, she loved them very much and was always there for them. Given the life they had and all the trauma they shared, it's crazy how they turned out so different as they grew their own branches and families. And it is amazing how poisoned some of the branches of a family tree can get.

The oldest child was the daughter. She was so bright, so very smart. She looked so much like her mother and excelled when it came to academics. She was also quite popular at school and a bit of a teacher's pet at times. She remembered her parents together. She remembered the pain and the abuse her family went through. But life is odd and sometimes people don't learn the lessons that history has shown them before. While in high school, the daughter met a boy. She fell in love with him and they are still together to this day. The problem? He has always been quite abusive as well. Violent, manipulating, another cruel man. He became addicted to drugs and his abuse only grew worse from there.

The daughter and this man got married. They had three kids of their own, 2 daughters and a son. These innocent children ended up in the same toxic cycle as their mother when she was young. They watched as their mother was abused and mistreated, nearly killed to many times. They watched as their mother's mental health deteriorated. She's scared and angry, puts the father over her children at all turns. Now these kids are adults as well. The oldest daughter with PTSD and depression, fear of people and a tendency to battle with suicidal thoughts. She struggles to survive as a young adult in a scary world and refuses to ever bring another child into it. The other daughter seems fine but turns to recreational drugs and alcohol to cover and hide her pain. She ran from her household the first chance she got and avoids her past to the best of her ability. And then the younger son... he may be the worse off at the moment. He can't handle life, he has health problems that keep him in his mother's care. Not that he would survive in the world anyways. He stays hidden in his room, buried into video games and away from society's eyes. He believes in nothing positive, has no hope in life, and only wishes for change. But their mother is convinced she needs that man and because of her inability to detach herself, she has poisoned her own branch so significantly, it may never grow any further.

Next we have the middle son from the original sibling group. He was a mama's boy and soaked a lot of what he experienced, in. He hated his father and swore to be nothing like him. Growing up the son was smart, he loved math but because of conflicts at school and a lack of support he ended up dropping out before high school. He became a bit of a trouble maker but nothing to extreme. He loved his mother and helped her as much as he could. This son fell in love with a calm, soft spoken girl while they were fairly young. And he did exactly what he promised. He took care of her and to this day they are still happily married and very supportive of each other. They also had three kids of their own, almost four if it weren't for a miscarriage. This man and his family were very poverty stricken, as was the trend in this family. They struggled very much and couldn't give their kids what they thought they deserved. But he never stopped working hard for his kids, as his mother did for hers. This man battled his own demons as well. He had depression and a bit of a temper. His wife was a very anxious, easily frightened and shy woman. Nothing to dangerous but enough to trickle down their branch into their children as well.

Their oldest child was a daughter. She was so very smart in school. She loved to read and write and draw. She was also very sheltered at home. So she was a bit naïve and lacked some common sense on how the world worked. She was taught to be kind always and never fight. This led to a lifetime of bullies and tears for her and her siblings. The girl, who was so smart, grew to hate school because of it. She escaped into her mind. Like many of the females in this family she also fell into an abusive relationship. She was lucky and smart though, like her grandmother she escaped from that pain. Now she lives as a single mom, over protective of her own kids and scared of the world. With significant depression and anxiety of her own. Next, the middle child was a son. He was always loud and a bit troublesome growing up. Always had something to say and a bit of temper. He grew up and married his own shy, quiet woman and they had 3 kids of their own. He ended up with a bit of a temper and can be a bit verbally abusive towards those close to him. But he knows his weaknesses and is always trying to improve them. His ADHD and OCD making things complicated at every turn. Then there is the youngest son of the family. He was also very smart growing up and like his sister liked to keep to himself. But like his brother and father he grew to have a bit of a temper. He butted heads with his other siblings often and as he grew became less likely to turn to his family for anything. He never wanted to grow up but now lives a secluded and private life with his girlfriend of so many years. He keeps things to himself while avoiding the idea of bringing new life into the world. He hides behind drugs like marijuana or alcohol. Though this branch ended up with its own types of trauma, there may be some hope for it as it continues to grow and the next generation sprouts out into their own growth.

Then, finally, there is the youngest son from the original family branch. This sibling is by far the worst seed of that particular bunch. He was very young when his family pulled apart. He grew up angry, mean, and a criminal. This son stole, harmed others, did drugs, and ended up marrying an equally cruel woman. These two toxic adults also had 3 kids of their own. Kids they neglected and abused. Kids that had to endure the pain of this "love" and who all grew up to live tragically difficult lives.

The oldest, yet again, was a daughter. She had numerous health issue growing up. Nerve damage, poor muscle growth, things her parents ignored and didn't care for appropriately. She grew up on various drugs that numbed her and because of her lack of love as a child, she now chases "love" as an adult. Grasping onto abusive, drug addicted men who use her and lie to her. She has 2 kids from different relationships that she tried to use as a way of keeping the abusive men from leaving her. Eventually, losing custody of both kids because of her inability to be a mother. The middle child to these 2 monsters was a son. He was healthier than his older sibling but because of his lack of love from his parents and never truly seeing how a relationship works, he grew to toxic and abusive as well. Mistreating his partners and having 2 kids of his own that he also lost custody of. He's always one violent act away from ending up dead or in jail. And then finally, there is the youngest of this branch. As the baby, she received a bit more "love" then her siblings. But because of the level of poison she was subjected to and witnessed, she is also growing into an angry, violent adult. So much that she attacks and abuses her own grandmother out of spite. This branch was doomed from the start and is surely only going to continue to further poison any new generation that comes from the last.

Three different branches that came from the first, each with three different branches of their own. All so very dramatically different from the last, even though they came from the same original seed. The world is already so full of trauma and pain. Our children will have to experience the world's pain eventually on their own as they grow. Pain from their peers, future relationships, illness, and war. Why do we feel that they need to deal with it at home as well? Stop the spread of the family trauma at you. Don't put it onto your kids. Let them enjoy their youth. Let them know what true love is by showing them at home. The world will never improve, give them a safe place away from it all.