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This is How Toxic Masclunity causes Misogyny

It is like a toxic controlling relationship that is hard to escape.

By QalamPublished 3 years ago 4 min read
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From Unsplash byAlexandru Zdrobău

This popular term is translated as the hate, dislike, or contempt of women simply because they bear certain body parts and attributes that make them women. Misogyny is a term that is heard about, written about, and discussed with a lot less rage than issues like men’s rights, misandry, or man-hating behavior.

Why? It is because misogyny is what we as a society are more complicit with. Society collectively feels less aggravated when they notice injustice against women as compared to men.

Whenever it comes to female empowerment or female rights, many voices are screaming about men’s rights.

Why is it that we can comfortably go centuries depriving women of fundamental rights to the point where we contempt women, but as soon as we talk about female empowerment people are allowed to confuse it with?

Many wise elderly people will answer this question easily: ‘It is how this world work’ or ‘this is how it has always been’.

The wisdom has to be acknowledged because there is truth to their words. The world has been misogynistic since the very beginning of mankind. It has become the accepted norm to disadvantage and marginalise one half of our society.

However, this is the easy answer, and so consequently it does not challenge us to change.

It is the answer that has become the way of life thus, entrenching inequality between the two halves of our society.

Misogyny is about the power struggle between men and women. It is about who should have more of a say in the world. Misogyny is hate. And hate is not a natural attribute of humankind. And as cliche, as it may sound but the truth is that we humans all deeply want the opposite of hate which is love.

So the question is: why has misogyny been so deeply embedded in our society?

Misogyny is a result of toxic masculinity. It is the consequence of the fragile ego of men that is hurt with very little success of women. A bit like a men’s rights group that only comes out when discussions about female empowerment become prominent. Misogyny is, in essence, the response that women get when they try to break away from inferiority and in many cases attain their fundamental rights.

Masculinity becomes toxic when it becomes adamant about always being dominant. However, one must realise that when disadvantaged people gain their rights it does not necessarily make anyone less powerful. Women attaining their rights does not deprive men of theirs and it does not disadvantage them.

It is the insecurity that comes from irrational and child-like stubborn thoughts that leads to toxic masculinity. Which is intolerant of women walking their own paths. It is the fear of losing control.

It is much easier to understand this social injustice when we break it down and consider it on a smaller scale. Think of it as a toxic controlling relationship. In this relationship, there is a dominant partner who is obsessed with controlling not only their relationship but also their partner. And then there is the partner that is intimidated and controlled. The weaker partner doesn’t know until it’s too late that they are in a negative space.

This is very comparable to the situation of women and the slow progress of female empowerment in this world.

It has been centuries but it has become too late for women to realise that they are being disadvantaged hence the progress is slow. Women have remained diligent to the duties given by society to them and many young girls in the most progressive of societies are growing up only to conform because there is no other way of life.

It is not a bad thing that women have been given the work of managing the home and bringing up the children, but it is not right when they feel compelled by unsaid standards to do so. It is wrong when women dedicate themselves yet are not appreciated. But rather their work, care, and dedication are not recognised. This shows our inherent attitude of hate towards women, which makes us devalue any work women do.

This contempt of women that is rooted in the desire to control women has spread its roots in all areas of life. This is why it is common for us to witness so many phenomenons that disadvantage women in modern-day society.

Treated as inferior to brothers, being the property being passed from father to husband, period poverty, gender pay gap, workplace harassment, sexual harassment, rape crimes, honor killings.

One cannot name every injustice that girls and women across the world have been enduring for several generations.

Such injustices have been and remain to suppress women and their voices. We need to voice these injustices and more importantly talk about their root causes if we want to create a better world for the upcoming generations of both girls and boys.

This idea of ‘that’s the way it has always been’ has to change. We cannot remain using such phrases to conform to injustices. We may think it is just a few words but in effect, these words comply with the heinous crimes mentioned above. Our language is very important, it passes on a message more than just words. It can shape our culture in the longer term.

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About the Creator

Qalam

Thinker. Writer.

Instagram:@qalam.blog

Medium:@Qalam.blog

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