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The Break Up Playlist My Middle School Best Friend Made Me

Thank you Annabel

By Melissa in the BluePublished 3 years ago 3 min read
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The Break Up Playlist My Middle School Best Friend Made Me
Photo by DESIGNECOLOGIST on Unsplash

I grew up in China, so I had no Youtube. No idea of the pop culture wars that went on in the outside world. The only thing I knew about Britney Spears was that she had a song about hitting people. Blissful ignorance. I grew up on CDs my parents had bought of the 60s, 70s, 80s, and even occasionally (gasp) the 90s, but also from the 1600s, the 1700s, and the 1800s. Taylor Swift's Fearless was the first time I realised that music had continued to evolve beyond the Eagles (although I didn't actually hear it until 2011). So when I experienced a break up (we had only been dating for like, I don't even remember, 2 weeks?), my lovely friend made me a playlist that was far, far more angst ridden than my actual breakup.

There's this post going around that goes something like "I like to think of all the ways that people I don't interact with anymore affect my life." I think this is such a beautiful concept—no matter how far we part, we still live in each other's heads. We exist in so many ways outside of our own bodies. Like, we style our clothes in ways inspired by strangers, or we drink our tea in a way that an old mentor taught us how to. Well, I listen to my middle school best friend's breakup playlist whenever I want to feel something, because does anyone really have more feelings than a 14 year old? I think not.

Anyways, here's Annabel's playlist.

1. Fix You — Coldplay

Can you really have a breakup playlist without it? If this were a stage of grief, it would be denial.

2. The Only Exception — Paramore

How does one explain the heartbreak of an angsty, 'you don't get it mom!!! I LOVED him!!!', 14 year old better than Paramore? You can't.

3. Five For Fighting — Superman (It's Not Easy)

Ok like, obviously, as a 14 year old, I was fighting battles on par with Superman. It really isn't easy to be me!

4. Matchbox Twenty — Unwell

Ooh, this is the good stuff. The extra, more angsty stuff. I'm not crazy I'm just a little unwell is the only vibe I have left going on in my mind. This stage of grief is definitely anger. Scream your heart out type anger.

5. The Pretty Reckless — Just Tonight

Little Cindy Lou Who really has got me feeling reckless, like I'm gonna go down to a bar and go absolutely WILD. Pounding shots, probably.

6. The Script — Breakeven

I'm not gonna lie, I don't actually know what the lyrics are, besides I'm falling to pieces. And hey, thats a permanent vibe, heartbreak or not.

7. Secondhand Serenade — Fall For You

Ok, back to the softer, sadder stuff. The bit about giving up. If this were a stage of grief, it would be bargaining. No, I did not fall for him again.

8. Passenger — Let Her Go

Speaks for itself really, doesn't it. Hope he only knew his lover when he let her go :/

9. Of Monsters and Men — King and Lionheart

Yeah she doesn't know why this is in this playlist either, it's just a really good song! We don't understand the music video either, but oh well!

10. Maroon 5 — She Will Be Loved

Nothing like a good, reassuring song to end the playlist. You will be loved, yes you, 14 year old me. You will find love and all the good glorious things in the world, just not at 14! We skipped a step of grief, so this can be both depression and acceptance, though you could probably argue that this whole playlist has been depression.

So there you have it. A playlist full of angst and heartbreak, approved by 14 year olds, the experts in angst and heartbreak.

playlist
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About the Creator

Melissa in the Blue

hold my hand and we can jump straight into the cold unloving sea

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