I'll give it this much, it was better than Hellraiser: Inferno. Of course, you could make a movie about drinking a shit milkshake and it would be better than Inferno. Yes, that's right, I'm suggesting that turning 2 Girls, 1 Cup into a major motion would have been better than the absolute festering cesspool of red-hot, bloody diarrhea that was Inferno. And this pretty much means I'm never going to do a review of Inferno. My review would just consist of me spraying diarrhea into a Sunday dish, drinking it, and telling you how much better it was than Inferno. The closest you're going to get is my review of Judgment.
Audio! Fucking audio people! There was so much echo and feedback it was hard to hear what people were fucking saying! I shouldn't have to watch an English movie with the subtitles on! Especially one that was loud enough to be heard normally if it wasn’t for all the earsplitting distortion. Man, don't get me wrong, the dialog is solid and even natural, and the soundtrack is pretty smart too. But Jesus FUCKING Christ, wish someone had checked the levels on the god damn audio. Thought I was going to have a migraine.
I'll give them this, for an independent film that was made with zero budget, they had the right idea. Actually, for a brief moment, they bordered on brilliance. I really wish they'd seen the movie inside their movie, and developed that instead. I'll have to get to that in the spoilers, but suffice to say, it was a really solid moment in what was otherwise a generic slasher. It proves they can do better.
All right, this movie got a bad wrap. The way people talk about it, I was expecting full blown Birdemic or even Troll 2. Okay, it was bad, but basically it was bad because the CGI was fucking shit. This is a shoe-stringer from an independent studio. I expect the kind of quality that I'd get out of Gravitas or Uncorked. AND, on the rare occasion those studios produce a gem.
Seven masterful stories about the deep state, which deliver predictable, but devastatingly dark depictions of those who fought to make our country an Oligarchy, and rob us of our liberty.
The movie was awful and campy and tropey as fuck! AND IT WAS FUCKING AMAZING AND I LOVED EVERY SECOND OF IT!!!