Reed Alexander

Reed Alexander

I'm the foulmouthed horror movie critic. I post new reviews every Sunday, so stay tuned =D

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  • Reed Alexander
    Published 2 months ago
    Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Forrest' (2016)

    Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Forrest' (2016)

    This movie is just plain dumb, with some of the worst fucking acting I've ever seen. I mean, 'Tommy Wiseau School of Acting' bad. Mind you, not as bad as The Bay (2012), more like on par with They (2002). If you're making movies with a budget, there's no excuse to have bad acting.
  • Reed Alexander
    Published 2 months ago
    Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Doom: Annihilation' (2019)

    Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Doom: Annihilation' (2019)

    You may remember from my review of the original Doom (2005), that fans were unnecessarily critical of it for not really using any of the video game cannon. My response to this was, "So the fuck what?" It had all the right elements for a fun action/horror, and still had enough similarities with the video game franchise to call itself Doom. It also pioneered the FPS movie years before things like Hardcore Harry or Found Footage Hybrids like Chernobyl Diaries.
  • Reed Alexander
    Published 4 months ago
    Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Get Out' (2017)

    Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Get Out' (2017)

    To be blunt, I had no idea how I was gonna tackle this movie. In my review of Us (2019), I mentioned that I wasn't going to make an embarrassing attempt to 'white-splain' the ethnocentric, sociopolitical implications of the movie. By and large, one of the biggest reasons I didn't do a review of Get Out (2017), is due to the fact, that subject is unavoidable.
  • Reed Alexander
    Published 5 months ago
    Reed Alexander's Horror Review of "Midsommar" (2019)

    Reed Alexander's Horror Review of "Midsommar" (2019)

    Jesus fucking Christ. I haven't seen a movie go for broke on the whole "asshole boyfriend" trope since White Settlers (2014). At least that asshole showed some growth. This prick doubled down at every moment of the movie. He goes from gaslighting his girlfriend Dani (played by Florence Pugh), to stringing along their relationship rather than dumping her, to using Dani's sister's suicide as a weapon, to being completely unsupportive as a boyfriend, to stealing a thesis from someone who is supposed to be a friend, to eye-fucking ever woman in sight. The list goes on and fucking on. GOD! How hard do you have to drive home the guy being an asshole?
  • Reed Alexander
    Published 5 months ago
    Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Camp Dread' (2014)

    Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Camp Dread' (2014)

    I love the basic concept of this movie. It's like Don't Fuck In The Woods, with a myriad of strung together, fan favorite, tropes. It shows you the people making this movie were fans before they were writers and directors. Actually, a lot of the set up reminds me of Cabin in the Woods, except more of a spoof and as a reality TV show instead of an Illuminati conspiracy.
  • Reed Alexander
    Published 5 months ago
    Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Tell Tale Heart' (2020), a host film.

    Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Tell Tale Heart' (2020), a host film.

    This one is gonna be rife with -SPOILERS-, but c'mon. It's The Tell Tale Heart, by Edgar Allan Poe.