Reed Alexander
Bio
I'm a horror author and foulmouthed critic of all things horror. New reviews posted every Monday.
@ReedsHorror on TikTok, Threads, Instagram, YouTube, and Mastodon.
Check out my books on Godless: https://godless.com/products/reed-alexander
Stories (309/0)
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Void' (2016)
Let me just start out by saying, there was a LOT about this movie that was testing my fucking patience. It really prayed on "Weaker Sex Syndrome" far too often, and for a hot second, I could swear they were doing "Gladiator Moments." There was scene after scene of what seemed like completely unrelated artsy bullshit. Thank god I was wrong about that because I really wanted to like this movie just from the premise.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Dig Two Graves' (2014)
This movie is Oscar material as far as I'm fucking concerned. It also touches my hillbilly roots a little bit. So if you want an idea of the kinds of wife’s tales I grew up on, you can watch this movie and get a good feel for them.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Land Shark' (2017)
I was scrolling through Tubi which has a multitude of cheese movies and came across one entitled Land Shark. Apparently, my wife had seen this hot mess before and suggested it as a potential good-bad movie. I have to tell you, it did not disappoint. In the category of "So Bad It's Good" I'd place this gem along side the original Carnosaur. Of course, Carnosaur didn't have CGI to work with, so mostly all they had was a green screen and a dinosaur hand puppet. Land Shark doesn't leave out the hand puppet but I really wished they'd leaned on the practical FX more than CGI.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'The Blob' (1988)
You know, it's surprising how revolutionary this movie was for crap 80s horror. But If you really think about it, The Blob kind of defied a lot of horror norms, all of which we take for granted today. Many of the norms it defied, you’ll regularly hear me bitching about, such as "Black Guy Dies First" or "Weaker Sex Syndrome."
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Black Mountain Side' (2014)
This was a damn good movie. It's definitely not for everyone. I'm not sure what kind of crowd this would appeal to but it hit all my buttons. It was just such an intelligent movie. The characters, step by step, logically addressed the illogical. It's based on Lovecraft's "The Mountains of Madness." It doesn't follow the actual story of H. P. Lovecraft, but rather supposes what happened before "The Mountains of Madness" kicks off.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Apostle' (2018)
I was initially hoping this was going to be a little more like The Wicker Man, as a sort of period piece. It wasn't but I was not disappointed. If you're a fan of my horror reviews, you may remember my scathing review of VVitch.The good things I have to say about VVitch I can parrot here. Stunning visuals, hopelessly dark, anachronistically spectacular. I'm a fan of period pieces and really appreciate any effort. They did trip up a couple times. for instance, while wick lighters existed, Zippo style clasp lighters didn't exist for another 25 years. You could also tell that the shells they used in the guns were plastic, while they would have either been brass or paper shells. So VVitch gets the award for superior anachronisms, but as a movie still sucked.Apostle was actually quite good. There where of course a few things that bothered the shit out of me. Such as the over arching plot essentially being just another tired ass "damsel in distress" movie. They did "spoon feed the villains" a bit. The ending didn't make a ton of sense, or, it simply not how I would chose to end it. But the acting was fantastic. It was good for Hollywood, which is of course rare. The atmosphere was dark, drab, and depressing, in the sense that it was both morbidly dark and shot with very little light. In my review of VVitch I explained how this made the sens of hopelessness consuming, but also forced you to watch it in the dark which just drove the atmosphere home. Finally, regardless of its faults, the plot was at least well written and held interesting new mythos to explore.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Critters' (1989)
Here's the truth about Critters. This movie is abjectly terrible. It's basically got the production quality of Night of the Creeps and the critters themselves are the "R" rated versions of Gremlins. Absolutely everything about this movie is laughable right down to the soundtrack. And that is exactly why I love this movie and you should too.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror
Reed Alexander's Horror Review of 'Don't Kill It' (2016)
This movie was made for riffing... Or, at least it had better have been, that's what I spent the whole movie doing. This movie was utter nonsense and Dolph Lundgren's cowboy accent is its icing on the cake. If the person who directed this expected anything less than riffing gold, I’m not sure what he was trying to accomplish.
By Reed Alexander5 years ago in Horror