I was supposed to be writing a book about customer service and experience for the past … oh that’s not good, I can’t remember which is an indication of how long it’s been, whew child. The book was supposed to be my springboard into my own business consulting firm as I was going to be revolutionary in my approach. After 20 years in sales and customer service I am confident that I have gained enough knowledge and experience to teach and coach businesses on how to increase their profits through the action of customer service. Simple enough. I started to write the book and if memory serves me correctly I have a few chapters. Here’s the hiccup, my heart is not in adding to the multitude of publications already out there about customer service and customer experience that apparently no one is really buying or fully implementing.
I woke up feeling off centered today; not too unusual as I have not awakened feeling good for the past several years. I have come to the realization that as of last year I have been grieving quite a few things. I have been grieving the past me with all her mistakes, things done wrong to her, and issues that simply cannot be swept aside. Grieving family members that have passed, friendships that ghosted themselves, and romantic and family relationship issues that I have resolved to not even mend. The only answer I have for how I cope is that I have fully employed the trick my mom taught me: to navigate life in the third person. I call it the “third person trick”.
The Joy of D-Rated Movies!
No one ever tells that one day you will wake up and you suddenly become 'target practice'. Please know that this new person you have transformed into will be not be a foreigner to those around you. Your loved ones will automatically recognize this new person, friends will greet them with open arms, lovers will touch them with familiarity. The only person who will be hesitant to bring this person into the fold will be you. See what had happened was you got older. Now allow me to quickly inform you that is all you did, you got older; you are not 'target practice'.
“Because I am married and been married since we have known each other!” and just like that, the room fell silent but I smirked and leaned in and said “and it all makes sense now”. I have questions and not the typical scenario questions, I don’t want to know who she is, what she does, or anything else that has to do with her. I don’t want to know why he didn’t tell me when we met, when we became friends, before we had sex, the next time we had sex, our first argument, our last argument, when family members passed, numerous text messages? Why was it not the topic of discussion during the up-tempt times we said we would go our separate ways? None of it made sense or makes sense and it is simply not ever going to either. I have no reason to feel sad or bad about the situation. I can walk with my head held high because I did not break up a happy home or enter into this situation knowing the truth. I am not the deceiver however I do not feel better nor good about any of it.