What a time to be alive. What a fierce time of passion, death, and deceit. We have been here before. Generations of Deja Vu. Moments of ease like treasuring our family time and realizing that Capitalism has stripped us from being able to create a real family unit. This centering on money, as we live makes us swing from vines, jump through hoops, and dance around for a bottomless pit of merciless abusers. Who are those abusers? It is the very people that uphold and justify the way that the majority of the world has lived its life for centuries. NEWS FLASH... It is not working!!!!
Out of curiosity I was typing away at a Crossword Puzzle from "It's A Black Thang.com". The online puzzle bursted with historical facts of black past. There was one question that stood out! "In 1901 who was the first President to bring Booker T. Washington to a White House Dinner?" I was stumped! So, when I searched.. unsurprisingly it was Theodore Roosevelt.. husband of Eleanor Roosevelt pioneer feminist and the progressive politicians of our colored history. This led me to another fun fact. The first black artist to perform in the White House! ( Who I will reveal first...) Using this time for Women's Month I will chronicle the black beauties of our past.
Life is dark. From listening to the stories of my peers our lives are full of cycles of sweetness but then sour heartbreaks of many relationships that touch the nerve of many parts of us. The tender sensitive parts of you do not know how to handle those outside forces ( they may be the job that you got fired from for being late, it may be the goal that you had to lose 20 pound but you just cant seem to come down, or it may be mental illness punching strong that tells you those words from your childhood that you are pathetic or some devastating explicative) It can feel like even when the sun is out our chronic pain on the inside will not rest, and it makes our lives feel like a cage that we can't escape from. When we feel helpless to the circumstances of our lives we grieve. Ways that I have grieved include:
You can be reading this to get some much-needed breathing space. It is binding to live in a way that is not your true self. There are times when I write in my journal and I think about the vast words of power, and yearning for those white pages of experience to be filled in my own life. Just like words written on a page, life has its warped edges, and sometimes, the scribbles share your perfect truth. Well if you are reading this like me, I am longing to find a new feeling other than racing my pen over pages to get that release out.
Ripping off a bandage, stubbing your toe, getting a burn from a flaming hot pot. This is how it feels to leave a loved one. I have had many intimate connections, with people. Being close means that emotions are high, and trust is needed at every corner. It is those moments where your brain chooses the ones that you can be settled, yourself, and honest. Not a lot of people are chosen to have that delicate and necessary position. When your love language is quality time, or you have dealt with abandonment in your upbringing, leaving a spouse, friend, dog, or close connection of anytime can be a moment that tests your inner child.
After anxious attacks i couldn't fathom the