Writing has always been intimate for me, maybe it's the way I write, or the way my stories seem to sound made up; someone asked recently, why am I writing this on plain ol internet when I can write it in a book; they were referring to entry 104. I replied " He is not my story: I am " and all the doubt that had started in the back of my mind, was put to bed. I am a great writer, always been; I've written since I could spell, in both languages; Spanish and English. I wrote stories, related to experiences I had growing up, but I've never had the balls to write MY story and doing so now, is the most amazing feeling I've felt in a thousand years.
When I was 16, I begged my mother to take me to the GYN because I was having painful menstrual cycles; after a few attempts to take care of them at home she made an appointment for me, she asked me "are you having sex?" flat out while we waited in the waiting area "No" and that was the truth; was someone raping me? yes.
Kintsugi changed how I viewed all of my world, it changed how I thought about myself and the process I was currently enduring; it was hard to see outside the box because well, when you are told you are broken a million pieces, how can you possibly sit with patience and begin working at it? how can you take what's left and converted to what is next?
Entering the ring on the left is Heart, entering the ring on the right is Mind.
It was horrible, but the sweetest thing ever at the same time, is like having to pee so bad but being far away from home, so you go on your pants, and though you know you will regret it the second it starts to warm your legs, you do it because; you have to pee.