Lindsay Rae Brown
Lindsay Brown is a freelance writer who loves to give people a chuckle with relatable stories about everyday life.
I Quit Smoking By Reminding Myself That Cigarettes Are Like A Bad Boyfriend
I’m quitting smoking for roughly the 15th time in my life. I know, that’s a shitty track record — considering I’m in my mid-thirties.
How to Get Kicked Out of Your Facebook Writing Group
So you’ve decided to get serious about writing. Before now, you’d write hard for two weeks and then not think about writing for a month or two. You allowed the muse to guide you. Nevertheless, according to that book, you’re going to need to change everything about yourself to achieve success. So, after three hours of Googling “How to be a writer,” you find there is one fundamental consensus from the writing community that you cannot escape. You must connect with other writers.
Space Faith Chapter 2
His tongue parts me. I’d be lying if I said it didn’t feel fucking fantastic. As far as fetishes go, this one isn’t too bad. It’s definitely better than tonsil toeing and button blowing. And I’ve got to say, the guy knows what he is doing. I just wish he didn’t insist on keeping that damn door open. I can see lollygaggers gawking as I ride Tobias’ tongue. Judging from this one’s flushed cheeks, she hasn’t been aboard Allure for long.
Space Faith Chapter 1
“Back on Earth, they call our profession one of the more honest ways to make a living,” says Jacey. At least, I think that’s what she said her name was. Damn, why can’t I keep anything straight in this place?
An Open Letter to Dick Wad: The Man Who Coughed on a 60-Year-Old Cashier During a Global Pandemic
Dear Mr. Wad: A few weeks ago, I had the opportunity to witness your tête-à-tête with an elderly clerk at the grocery store. And, I must say, I am appalled by what went down on that fateful afternoon. The incident in question involved you coughing onto the woman’s exposed skin and her, outrageously, becoming upset by this mishap. After a bit of sleuthing, I was able to procure your name in order to write this open letter for all to read about your no-less-than-heroic actions that day.
Excuse Me, Is This a Penis on My Menu?
It has come to my attention that I am a dirty rotten pervert. This information did not come as a surprise because I am a scumbag. But, a cute adorable scumbag. That’s precisely why I’ve gotten as far as I have in life.
Space Faith the Prologue
A snarling light is trying to tear my retinas clean out of their protective layer of eyeball. I am momentarily blinded. Darkness surrounds me, but it is not startling. I am partial to the dark. I know it well.
A Splash of Cold Water Brings Down Swelling Under the Eyes
My mom always told me to splash cold water on my face after I had been crying. I suspect this is because that's what her mother told her. In turn, I have told young people I love this same advice as a helpful tip on how to hide one's shame.