I am a thinker of many thoughts so many that they pour out my eyes, trickle from my ears, and spray out my nose! The best remedy for this "syndrome", is to write it all out instead. A much less messy release I must say.
The Helbredelse Chalet
We drove up the snowy, winding road towards the cozy A-frame cabin. Quaint and rustic with a wrap around deck, the russet hued cabin was nestled into a hovel of snow laden pine trees. I lowered my head to look past the windshield at the crown of the A-frame to see wooden embellishments of prancing deer and flitting songbirds encased in icicles. Excitement and nervous energy rumbled in my stomach. It had been over two years since we had a get-away like this, two years and two children. Heavens knows how much I needed this retreat. We need this retreat.
Achievemephobia. The fear of succeeding, or the fear of achieving your goals. I will never forget the day that this stunning revelation settled in my mind. I had fought and struggled for years against this fear without ever having a name for it. I had always told people that I was a "Professional Procrastinator", or that I had a mental block that prevented me from finishing projects. I was an artist. A fine artist, working mainly in oils. I don't even think I can count the number of unfinished art pieces stored in my studio room. Once I realized that my issue wasn't a mental block, or procrastination, but was a fear of succeeding as an artist it was as if the millions of puzzle pieces of my life fell into place. I could see clearly. This has been my life long fear.
My Star. My Wild One.
My star. My wild one. She loves to sing and dance and has so much spunk and attitude. If you are harsh with her you will find no more formidable and opponent. But if you are gentle, reasonable and patient with her she will comply with any request happily. She lives up to her name - Finley means 'Fair Warrior'. She will never suffer a fool unless they are a kind fool and then she will only do so out of respect of their kindness. She is sharp and perceives situations and body language accurately. She does things on her own and growls with glee when she accomplishes each new challenge.