Novelist (writing as LJ Denholm) - Under Rand Farm - available in paperback via Amazon and *FREE* via Kindle Unlimited!
Short story writer - Mr. Threadbare, Farmer Young et al
Humour writer - NewsThump, BBC Comedy.
Kids' writer - TBC!
JASON AND DEMARARA
Jason had been a bit off with Demarara recently, and was again today. He was sat at the end of the sofa, murmuring dark threats into his phone when Demarara came in from the bathroom. On registering her aura, Jason quit his task and pocketed his phone, which was tough as his pocket was squished up against the sofa.
Woman successfully offsets huge carbon footprint by sharing climate change article on Facebook
This article was first published by NewsThump in March 2017. A woman who drives to the shops in a spotless 4×4 that has never left central London has successfully offset her vast carbon footprint by sharing a harshly worded Facebook link about climate change deniers, it was confirmed last night.
Hunting the White Car Man
hunting the + + + + W H I T E C A R M A N
British people who say ‘asshole’ instead of ‘arsehole’ are ‘massive t**ts’ finds study
A study exploring the ever-evolving quirks of British speakers of the English language has confirmed that those who choose to say the invasive American ‘asshole’ over the classic British ‘arsehole’ are ‘massive twats of the highest order’.
PETE HADDEN, VETERAN SCOTTISH RADIO DJ bursts back into his studio as a condensed radio edit of Purple Rain plays out. He is slightly out of breath; has spent the duration of the song in the bathroom. He is still zipping up his tailored, powder-blue jeans. The ON AIR light turns on the second he assembles himself in his seat, sitting on his phone which he has stuffed into his back pocket, and leans into his mic.
Under Rand Farm: An Excerpt
U N D E R R A N D F A R M Prologue