I’m a poet with sprinklings of fiction. I write with the soul, so I hope you find it interesting and relatable
11/15/21 Dear Unnamed, I hope you’re doing well. I hope you’re happy. I know things ended horribly between us, and part of me still blames you. It was because of your actions that things went so wrong, but assigning blame is so pointless, so I’m trying to stop and just let things be as they are. I’m not angry with you anymore. When I think of you, I am not overwhelmed with anger or sadness like I was before. I do try to avoid thinking of all the good things about you, though, because when I think of the good, I get sad. I get jealous of myself for having had something so good and letting it slip away. Not that I let you slip away. You violently pulled away, so it was not my choice. But saying this makes it sound like I am unhappy where I’m at now, which I’m not. I have found a man who loves me perhaps just as unconditionally as I love him. He is kind and smart and thoughtful. Let me tell you about him.
10/20/21 Dear Unnamed, You said once you have no dream way of being proposed to or have an idea of how to do the proposing. We may never even get married, but let me tell you my dream way of getting proposed to. I’m a hopeless romantic and I’ve done a lot of thinking on this, and wile there re a lot of ways I’ve daydreamed about, I have finally discovered my favorite idea thus far. Let me set the scene for you:
10/19/21 Dear Unnamed, I think you are the love of my life. I have known I love you for some time now, but we got drunk a few nights ago and it hit me that you might be everything I have been wanting my entire life. And maybe you think I am crazy. I am only 20, after all. I am young and naive. I would like to think that acknowledging the fact one is naive negates their naivety, but I don’t think that’s actually true. It only makes you more self aware. So, I am young and dumb and think I have my life figured out in the love aspect anyways all because a boy who looks like my daydreams showed up. I know how ridiculous this all sounds, trust me, I know. But how I feel is how I feel, and how I feel is madly in love with someone in a way that has broken me before. This scares me. I have loved with every proton, electron, or neutron, whichever there is the most of, before. And it nearly killed me to lose that love. You are even more fatal, though, and here is why:
Book Draft (so far)
Saturday, August 17, 2019 “Here’s your key, and if you need anything at all, let me know, dear,” says the lady behind the desk. Her name is Linda, and she’s already promised my mom she’ll keep an eye on me to make sure my transition to university goes smoothly. We’re moving all of my belongings into the dorms today. Linda also told us that there are plenty of nice looking young men around to give me a hand with whatever I need. I don’t particularly care about the nice looking young men. I’m more of an introvert and not quite ready to meet people yet.
09/06/21 Dear Unnamed, Do you remember how you used to always ask me about my boyfriend? You did this as far back as I can remember. You asked me this for years before I ever even had my first boyfriend. I’ve had several boyfriends since you’ve died. I thought the last one could have lasted forever. We were together a year and a half and we were madly in love, but I loved him more.