On March 4, 2020 I got engaged to the love of my life, Emily, and it was far from traditional, but is definitely a part of our story I’ll cherish forever. On March 4th, I was sitting on the couch in the living room and the thought of promise rings crossed my mind. I spontaneously asked Emily if she would like to get promise rings and she excitedly said yes. Our original plan was to order them from an online store but we weren’t sure of what sizes we needed so again I made the spontaneous decision to get us an Uber to take us to the mall. We went to a jewelry store and picked our rings. It was an easy decision, then from there we went to the food court. While eating dinner the topic of proposal came up. Emily said she had thought of proposing to me on our 1 year anniversary and honestly the rest is a bit of a blur because I was so happy that I had found my person. Eventually over that conversation, we decided we wanted more than a promise ring, we wanted to be engaged so we decided anxiously and excitedly, right there in the mall food court that we were engaged. This part of our story is so “us”. We are both goofy, non traditional, and love each other with our whole hearts. We are so comfortable around each other and we are the happiest we’ve ever been. I am confident that Emily is the love of my life and I will be with her for the rest of my life.
Being diagnosed with Anorexia at the age of 16 was not a part of my plan. I dreamed of being an ENT (ear, nose and throat) doctor while gigging in a band as a drummer on the side. For as long as I can remember being a doctor and a drummer was my plan, that plan took a huge turn after my parents made the decision to pull me out of the art school I was attending and put me back in the public school system. The short story for why they made this decision is that while I was already knee-deep in Anorexia at this point, yet still went unnoticed, I had decided I wanted to be a psychologist to help other people so therefore I did not want to take percussion as my elective any longer which my parents did not approve of.
I have taken blades and hot irons to my skin too many times to count.
I wonder if it’d be easier if I cried rainbows
I was told to draw the face of a clock
Today I listened to a song that gripped me harder than the hands that were wrapped around my neck by the man who said he loved me the night before.