A Noise in Her Nose
When Did eBay Become So Kafkaesque?
My friend paid $900 for a laptop. My friend never saw this laptop, never held this laptop in his hands. Not before he paid the $900, and not after he paid the $900.
I Inspire Word Vomit, Apparently
People confess things to me. Why? It's simple. I'm a good listener. Every good listener knows what I'm talking about. We let other people say what they want to say. We allow them to explore their thoughts, without interruption. We occasionally ask relevant questions, to facilitate the speaker.
I Read This Book: 'Beautiful World, Where Are You' by Sally Rooney
The story begins with a Tinder date. A woman named Alice meets a man named Felix at a bar. They drink. They talk. Right away, you, the reader, understands something about these people. What do you understand? These people are searching for something, but they don't know what they're searching for. Is it love? Sex? Are they looking for someone who will care about them? Are they looking for someone who will elicit care from them?
Where Are All the Girl Balloons at the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade?
There's a new giant balloon scheduled to float down 34th Street this Thursday in Manhattan. Actually, there are six new balloons in the Macy's Thanksgiving Day Parade in 2021. One of them stands out, though.
Why Do Rich Women Shop at ZARA?
While walking down Fifth Avenue in Manhattan last week, I saw a woman carrying a gigantic shopping bag with the word ZARA in prominent white letters against a beige background.
Stop Sending Me Updates About a Fourth Stimulus Check
By now, we all know the slippery slope of algorithmic engagement. Yes, sometimes the bots show you things you have an interest in. But the more you let them track you, the more you have to deal with this constant onslaught of trick mirror shenanigans.
I'm Not Smoking Pot All the Time
I made a mistake last summer. I told a friend of mine that I was coping with the pandemic by getting high. It was true. I was smoking weed last summer. But I wish I wouldn't have told my friend what I was doing in the comfort of my own home.
Why would anyone want a flat Earth?
I will describe nature, naturally, and in the middle of my sentences, black spots fold over each other like flies fighting for the best meat.