Mental Health Breakdown

Broken, shaking, cold...will I always be alone?

I'm the only one who knows how to handle this.

Sometimes I don't even know how.

I hold myself in a tight ball, shake, and cry until it stops.

No one else wants wants to handle this.

No one else knows how.

I can't blame them really but for once, I just want to be held.

I want to be told it's going to be okay.

I want to be told I'm safe.

I want to be told we'll get through this together.

You want peace; so do I.

Why do you think I play so hard?

I'm in constant pursuit of that peace.

Sometimes I get to feel it.

The demons quiet down and I can hear my therapist instead.

Sometimes though it gets so cold and my skin crawls.

The demons slither, crawl, whisper in my ears, and tell me I'm nothing.

Sometimes I don't want to be here anymore.

The fight is too much.

Death would be such an easy escape.

I can't though.

Too many people depend on me.

Mental health has such a stigma.

Why do I get shamed for this?

My battle that I never asked for?

This war I never started?

Don't we all have demons after all?

Or are you perfect?

Playing God now are we?

Damn it all to Hell!!

Kill the darkness, shine the light!

I want happiness!

My demons want to take my peace.

I keep fighting for it.

I will continue to fight until death takes me home.

This battle I did not start, I will finish.