Inner Monologue: 1 - Abandonment

It’s that feeling again.

What is it?

We promised ourselves we would never subject ourselves to this again.

What happened?

Another broken promise. More words that mean nothing.

I don’t understand.

Why did I do this to myself again? Why did I let someone in? Why did I think that they would be different?

Please, tell me what happened!

Time and time again I fall for the same tricks; the same "love"; the same promises.

...

And you know, for a moment, I was happy. I thought that this was the beginning of something much better. That it would cover up the horrible mistake I made years ago. But the same signs mean the same lies.

No. It has to be a mistake.

It's not. It's that feeling again.

Yeah.

Betrayal. Hurt. Anger.

Sadness. Loneliness. Broken.

Loss...

I thought I would never feel this again. Guess I was wrong. Again.

Weren't they different?

I thought so. I thought they loved me.

What changed?

Nothing.

I don't understand...

I am who I am. That's all. Me.

We aren't that bad.

We aren't good enough to love though. Somehow, it always ends the same. We are abandoned.

...why does it always end this way? Why do they always promise to be there...and then they're gone?

There was never any real love. Who could love us. Really. With everything going wrong in our life, who genuinely could love us. That's why they leave. We're not worth it.

When will we be worth it?

When we prove we are enough to love. When we find someone who won't leave.

What about the people now? Will they leave?

Sooner or later, yes. And we'll be alone again.

Always...