This Time I Promise

Life can be exhausting-

As humans we all share similar experiences. Therefore, we can relate when it comes to the phrase, "I need a break!"

How do I shut it all off without shutting everything out? It's more than just powering down my phone and turning off my computer. It's more of a mind-set. I could easily say to myself that I will just stop caring so much but that would be the selfish route. My lack of caring could really do some damage to relationships that I want to care about. I am not trying to become someone new with a new attitude. I enjoy who I am. I just need less stress in my life, which is mostly created by outside forces. The media, the Corona virus, bills and anxiety over the future all play a role in creating unwanted angst which leads to less rest for me. No matter how much we want to drop out completely sometimes and focus on number one, we just have too much going on in our lives to ignore it for two seconds... or can we?

It's time for a reasonable solution to all of this and it starts with one word. Appreciation. As long as you appreciate who you are, where you are from and where you are going then nothing can touch you. We are all created equal. Whether I'm a millionaire or living paycheck to paycheck it doesn't matter because my level of appreciation for life is worth more than anything monetary.

With that said its now back to how to achieve my New Year's gift of giving myself more rest and relaxation without disrupting the flow of my life. This requires a new routine...

Instead of changing my availability at work, I will give up any overtime offered to me. Instead of walking the dogs every day I hired a dog walker for Monday through Friday. No need for their routine to change just because I need a break. Instead of shopping for groceries I now use a delivery service. Just go online, choose the stuff that I need and watch it magically appear on my doorstep. So far, I have gained a couple extra hours that I can dedicate to me, but I need more. If I cut down the amount of T.V I watch, I can gain more time. I definitely recommend staying away from the news. It's full of negative content and can trigger depressive side-effects that can make me lose focus of what I'm trying to accomplish: Rest

Time to turn off those thoughts- (Which can impede my goal.)

Remember that life is an alone process. You can be the most social person you know but at the end of everyday it's just you and your thoughts. If you've had the worst day and are having continuous thoughts about it, you are ultimately wasting precious time when you can be relaxing your mind. Yes, it's good to review my day, but I don't dwell on it. I can't change it so why beat myself up about it? Time to accept it and move on... This is easier said than done for some of us, I realize that. My peace of mind is more important though, I can deal with matters later.

Every time I get a thought that I don't want to entertain; I just say to myself "Next!" and move on to a different thought without looking back. If you have nothing else to think about other than how crappy your day was, then you have another problem to solve before you can turn your thoughts off from anything negative. You have to occupy your mind with something, and it's not your phone or TV. Maybe you read a funny book, or maybe something constructional. Just make sure it's material that makes you feel better.

I'm also trying meditation. I think a lot of us can benefit from it. It involves a lot of concentration. Some people can do it with ease. Maybe they have less going on in their lives, or no serious problems to deal with. There are different forms of meditation as well. Mindfulness Meditation- encourages you to focus your energies objectively on negative thoughts. Do yourself a favor and look up meditation to see if it's something for you.

Dealing with the family-

This can be a tricky one since most of us are literally intertwined with family. Nothing we can do can untangle the connection we have with our kids, spouse, mom, dad, friends and even co-workers. Instead of untangling the connections, you can smooth them out. One way is to spend less time on the phone with them. Instead of a thirty-minute call, shorten it in cases where you can. Another way could be to just tell people about your New Year's resolution. If they don't understand and thinks it's selfish then try explaining it to them again. I guarantee you they will become secretly jealous and will understand that it's something you really WANT to do for yourself.

Each one of us knows where we can gain more time to ourselves when it comes to family. I would imagine dealing with kids would be the most complicated, I don't have any but have enough nieces and nephews to know there are some steps you can take to continue your quest for more rest. You just have to find the right one for you. Whichever direction you go, keep the cost down because adding additional childcare costs to your monthly bills can backfire and create more stress trying to figure out how to pay for it. If your kids are infants or toddlers, a babysitter every other day for a few hours during the week would be less expensive than day care and would allow you to gain some time to treat yourself to some rest.

Outside of your kids everyone else in your life will understand if you need to cancel on them. If they really need to contact you during your down time, they can send you a message. You can get back to them later... If you are married, your husband or wife will more than likely understand and should be willing to help you accomplish your goal. Let them know that this is important to you and in the end, they will reap the benefits as well.

Why is it so Important that we do this for ourselves? Think about it, we just went through two years of uncertainty. That's 730 days and counting, that our lives have been abruptly changed. Causing most of us to work harder to make ends meet. Now that we have a handle on this new way of life, we need to relax. We are not out of the woods yet. For now though, we can at least put our minds at ease and get more rest.

Both mind and body require an adequate amount of rest to maintain good health. Whatever method you chose to get there my friend, make it a point to adjust your routine. Even after you calculate any changes you can make and can only come up with an extra hour to yourself a day, then I say it was a successful mission and well worth your time to do that for yourself. And don't feel guilty about using any of the extra time the way you want, you created it, now go enjoy it. Get some sleep or pick up where you left off on a project you threw to the side. Just Imagine all the things you can do. It gets me excited about things I'm going to do because this time I promised myself that I was keeping this resolution. I believe it's in my best interest to do so and it's working out great so far. I have already used my extra time to sleep more, write more, organize my coin collection, rest even more and I'm currently in the process of teaching myself a new skill. All I had to do was change my focus and eliminate things out of my routine that were counterproductive to my day.

Thanks Vocal! I really appreciate the assist.

Good luck everyone!

LW-