Melodies of Resilience

My name is Erzsébet and I like to make pretty sounds, amongst other things. At 34 years old, I've had a lifelong affair with music. From my earliest memories, melodies have woven through the fabric of my existence, touching me in ways words alone never could. There is just something about the power of sound and the impact it can hold on a person.

My musical journey began by stepping onto the stage of musical theatre, being in big bands, choirs and every musical activity that would I could possibly get myself into. I lived my life in the music department and I mean that literally. Teachers would find me in empty practice rooms so often, they stopped questioning my presence. I was put into piano lessons at 4, I picked up the saxophone during high school, and later taught myself the guitar. I liked to dabble my way badly through as many instruments as I can.

After high school, I delved into the world of folk music and songwriting, finding excitement in creating. I relished in crafting tales, weaving together chords and lyrics to form narratives that sometimes actually isnpired by movie plots.

I travelled on a journey that took me across the globe. From city to city, I traversed the world, seeking connection through music. Exploring castles and scenic landscapes for adventure and inspiration. At every point I shared my love with like minded others, playing at open mic nights and immersing myself in the local music scene. I found solace and joy in the universal language of music, leaving a piece of my melody in every country I visited. My sound evolved, and my style grew.

But then, I came home. And like so many, I found myself lost in the wake of COVID-19. The world shifted, and so did I. The passions that once fuelled me suddenly became sources of fear and anxiety. I lost myself in the chaos, disconnected from everything I believed I was. Nothing brought me joy anymore.

I reached my breaking point at the beginning of 2024. Fuelled by the weight of societal expectations, I pushed myself perfection fearing that I would not be good enough. Setting these imaginary standards that no one imposed on my but myself. I found myself drowning in fear and anxiety, where each day felt like a battle for survival rather than a life lived with purpose. The constant state of fight or flight consumed every fibre of my being, leaving me gasping for air.

Simple tasks became monumental challenges; breathing felt like a Herculean effort, and the most basic self-care routines became distant memories. It was in those moments that I realised something had to change. Existing wasn't enough anymore. I needed to reclaim who I once was. It was time to take control of my life, to rediscover the love and passion that had once fuelled my body.

So now I’m on a journey of self-discovery, one step at a time. Not letting the social expectation rule my thinking or bully me into conforming. It's a process filled with ups and downs, but each day brings me closer to finding myself again. I've found myself reconnecting the joy that creating once filled me with-picking up a guitar and smiling for the first time in years, finding pleasure int he simple act of preparing meals.

Through it all, I'm reminded that creativity isn't about perfection—it's about expression. It's about telling our stories, sharing our struggles and triumphs with the world. And as I continue on this journey, I want to share my story, talk about every step, every stumble, and every moment of growth along the way. I want a way to remember, look back and grow.