In-Tent

Is this the person she really wants to be with, or is this someone she is just settling for? Does she even knows what she wants? Or, is he just filling a void until she becomes sure?

Is this the person she truly loves? Does she even know the definition of true amor?

Does he satisfy her completely? Or does she creep on the side because he doesn’t satisfy her lustful appetite—causing her to have a hunger for more?

Does she want to be with him for who he is inside, or does she want more? Or, is she just fascinated with his wealth, and his bodies’ contour?

Is she willing to start over from the ground floor? Or, does she hold onto past experiences as if it were a game of tug and war?

Is she afraid to explore, because she is pessimistic to what the future may have in store? If she looks into the past and clear the cloudiness within the windows to her soul, she will have a clear vision of what she is looking for. But like most women, she refuses to do so because she wants a new future with an old door knob, and new hinges attached to a new door.

Is it because he is productive? Or is it lust, as she silently says to herself, “it is something about him that is so seductive?”

Is it because he is resourceful? Or is it his muscles—as she undresses him with her eyes—admiring his physique from his arms, to his torso.

Is she giving him affection because she is just being cordial? Sadly, she was never taught love is natural, and should never be faked and seen forceful.

Is it because of his money and his career? Is she with him because of her cumulative expenses —hoping he can pay her bills, and get her out of the arrears.

Is she with him, or is she just existing… just there? Or is it because she loves the way her fling made love to her when he deep stroked her from the rear; she reminisces the moment, stuck in a prolonged stare. Her fling has become her dream, and her man has become her nightmare. But she can’t just leave him because in the eyes of others, he and her makes a wonderful pair. Just the mere thought of starting over, is a scare.

Is she with him because he comforts her when she is in tears? Or is she with him just for the sake of just being with him, because he is her comfort zone, as they have been knowing one another for years.

Is she with him because she was influenced by her in laws, friends, family, and peers? She doesn’t know how it feels to do what’s in her heart: people have always been in her ears.

Is it because of his skin tone and color? Or is it because he looks similar to someone she used to love; she drifts down memory lane because he is a hybrid, and a hologram of her former lover.

Is it because the way he dresses, and the way he utters? Or is it because when he is in her presence her heart continuously flutters?

Is she with him because she is afraid of being lonely? Or is she with him for revenge, as she continues to have intimate relations with one of his homies?

She only loves men based on conditions. But, she was never taught that—causing her to form relationships upon hidden agendas, impure intentions, and letting others influence her decisions.

This story may be fiction. But the content has a sense of truth —as people love without their heart truly having jurisdiction.