Grubspute

I feel that this is a thing that many of you will relate to. We all eat. We all shop for food. You know that feeling when you’re in the supermarket, and you’re absolutely starving, but you have a list and you are trying to be good?

When your stomach is growling and that huge meat-feast deep-pan stuffed-crust pizza on the aisle shelf is calling out to you?

When your logical brain is saying, Get the salad, Get the low-fat yogurts, be healthy, stick to the list – but your empty stomach is screaming and yearning for the hot, cheesy, calorific fantasy food of your dreams – THAT is grubspute.

When you are on a strict time-limit and you have to shop clean and quick, and you have to lose that extra bit of weight, but hunger hormones are controlling your sanity like a puppet-master, moving you towards that gigantic pizza, and to your horror, the pizza is moving, stretching, rolling off the shelf and climbing towards you, like a starfish, across the shop floor, doughy fingers reaching for your shopping basket, clambering up and over the metal edges, until it sits, as if satisfied, amongst the peppers and onions and bananas.

You experienced grubspute. And sadly, your brain lost.