Parenting Shame

Can we stop shaming parents for having a break from their kids? I understand that maybe this comes from seeing some parents have nannys and never spend time with their kids, but for us, when we send our kids over to my parents they are spending quality time with their grandparents. Why do people shame us for that? Why would you shame someone that is letting their kids learn from someone older and wiser than even their parents?

I don’t know when it became so un-normalized for children to have a good, close relationship with their grandparents.

When I tell people my kids go for a sleepover once a week at their grandparents, they almost fall over, and almost always end up shaming me.

“I could never let my kids be watched by someone else weekly!” they often say. When did close relatives become "someone else"?

They are not “being watched.” They are spending important time with their grandma and papa. They are making memories that they will have forever, but can only make for a limited time.

It takes a village to raise children, and I am forever grateful for my "village."

My parents look forward to having my children once a week, and plan out so many exciting activities to do with them. It is as much a joy and treat for my parents as it is for me and my husband AND my kids.

My children can’t wait for the day that they go to Grandma & Papa's house. This is what they look forward to every week, the day they get to spend the whole time with their grandparents, with no parents to distract them! They constantly ask when and which day they get to go see papa and grandma next.

Stop shaming moms whose kids have a very close relationship with their grandparents. Maybe its hard for you, because you don't have that kind of relationship or trust with your parents. If thats the case, I'm so sorry. I wish for you someone in your kids lives that will be able to fill that space and connection for them.

But in the meantime, stop looking at it as “Oh wow, they just dump their kids off on their parents and check out.”

We are a family.

We help each other.

We take care of each other.

No one is being dumped on anyone.

Start looking at it as “Wow, how awesome those kids are growing up so close to their grandparents. Your parents time left on earth is uncertain, so how great they get to make memories right now, with your kids, so often.”

My kids keep my parents young, and my parents teach my kids things I can’t even begin to know how to teach them yet.

I will be forever grateful for my "village."

I will be forever grateful that my kids are so close to their grandparents.

It is one of the most important relationships they will ever have. They are learning wisdom from someone thats lived through so much more than I have. They are learning to respect and understand a different generation.

I will be forever grateful for my village.