Main Character Vibes

“You are alive, and you don’t need to justify your existence. You can be the biggest mystery in your own story.”

I recently discovered the work of Don Miguel Ruiz and it changed my life. After inhaling The Four Agreements, I decided to read The Voice of Knowledge. I had to stop reading the book for a bit because of how profoundly it shook me to the core.

I'm not done reading it yet, but the part that is sticking with me is where he talks about how you are the creator of your own story and everyone else is a secondary character.

The reason why this is sticking with me is because of my own issues with my mother. She is a secondary character in my life whilst I am the main character in mine. Just like I am the secondary character in hers.

She doesn't actually know me, just like I don't know her. I have an idea of who my mother is based on living with her for seventeen years and being raised by her. She has an idea of who I am after all that time too. I want her to know me, to understand me but is she capable of it? And that goes for anyone that you meet on your journey. You are just a secondary character in the lives of others.

I even sat back after I read that part and reflected on my own home. I began to think about my children and my partner. How they know me but they don't sit inside my brain all day and understand me the way I do. Same goes for them. I know them, I love them. But I don't know utterly everything about them. I want to but I don't have a mind drive like in the television series The 100.

Maybe that's why I write? To be understood.

Every-day, you wake up and decide who you want to be and what kind of person that is. Every-day, there are choices to be made. You get to decide what kind of person you are. You are the creator of your own story as per Don Miguel Ruiz.

The Four Agreements that he wrote about in the first book that I read really stood out to me.

1. Be impeccable with your word.

2. Don't take anything personally.

3. Don't make assumptions.

4. Always do your best.

After reading that book, I realized I haven't always been my authentic self. I struggled hard for a while there and I wasn't truly Chloe. I did my best but my best wasn't enough. I took everything personally. I make assumptions on how people feel about me.

Words create spells and if you use them intentionally they create magic.

You cannot go back, but you can move forward. I am doing so with a clear conscious.

2024 is supposed to be my redemption year. Not a year filled with regrets. People can laugh at me for it, but I am okay with me. And it took me a really long time to get to that place. I'm not letting anyone or anything bring me back down to level that I have already upgraded from.

I wish I understood my mother. I wish her well on her journey and continue to love her regardless. I wish she understood me. I'm working on healing my childhood baggage so my own kin don't suffer. I will always work hard on myself to better their lives and I think that's really important. I am after all, my own worst critic.

This author has changed my life in such a profound way. I wish I would have read his work so much earlier in life.

If you're interested in God and spirituality, than Don Miguel Ruiz is perfect for you. They are heavier reads in my opinion but so worth it. He inspired me to be the creator of my own story. To inspire others.

Chloe Rose Violet 🌹